I am bothered.

I am bothered by the things
that have happened and the things that are happening.
I am bothered by how expectations can change and how
they can inevitably stay the same.
I am bothered by the fact that no matter how much we think this world has changed
it hasn’t.
I am bothered that I am expected to keep my words to myself and never express
what I feel is right.

I am bothered.

I am bothered by the fact that no matter how hard I try
I cannot do anything right or give myself a break.
I am bothered that no matter who speaks, I never hear what they’re trying to say.
I am bothered that the voices in my head constantly dampen the words
I know I desperately need to hear.
I am bothered by my fears.
I am bothered that nothing I do can ever come out right
and I can’t stop blaming myself.
I am bothered by the fact that people will read this
and not understand where I am coming from.
I am bothered that people will understand
where I am coming from.

I am bothered by the simple fact that I am bothered.

I am bothered and I don’t know how to extinguish this feeling.
I am bothered and no one can help me because I refuse
to let them.
I am bothered that no one helps me.
I am bothered by my identity-- what little of it that there is.
I am bothered that I don’t ever leave the house.
I am bothered that when I do
I just want to go home.
I am bothered that no matter what I do I cannot be happy
with my privileges.
I am bothered that this piece is not what I wanted it to be.
I am bothered that I am not what my mother set
out for me to be.
I am bothered that there are people who don’t like me.
I am bothered that there are people who do
infact like me.
I am bothered that I can’t think of a perfect way to end this.
I am bothered that this has to have an end.
I am bothered that you have an opinion on
the things I have to say.
I am bothered that I am unable to hear what you have to say.
I am bothered that you have probably become rather annoyed
with that phrase.
I am bothered that I cannot please everyone.
I am bothered that I can’t
let things go.
I am bothered that I let things go
far too easily.
How do I feel
You ask
Well

I

am bothered.