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Time will reveal everything I want to know now.
I wish time was just the name of a street.
I’d drive a black car up and down time.
I’d be happy.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.




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PerfectMGymnast This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Mar. 23, 2011 at 11:02 am:
So simple yet so beautiful!! :)
 
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nancyyy said...
Mar. 3, 2011 at 7:26 am:
Although this poem is short it is very thought provoking. I like the whole idea of time in the poem and how simply you put the words to be understood by many people.
 
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NicoleSThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Mar. 1, 2011 at 5:51 pm:
great poem! it's simple and short, but very poignant and powerful! loved it
 
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mcnwritingsoul said...
Mar. 1, 2011 at 3:23 pm:
Can someone plzzz comment on my poems...im desperate for feedback!
 
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mcnwritingsoul said...
Mar. 1, 2011 at 3:22 pm:
 Can someone pllzzzzzzzz comment on my poems!!
 
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mcnwritingsoul said...
Mar. 1, 2011 at 3:21 pm:
It doesnt have much power. I wasn't shell shocked or stunned at the end.....you should work on the ending. This poem is very good, yet it also has great potential!!!! 8)
 
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EmilyMichelle This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Mar. 1, 2011 at 1:50 pm:
This is a great poem! Short, sweet, simple, and to the point. Great job!
 
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michaelchavez said...
Mar. 1, 2011 at 10:44 am:
nice poem there
 
the anitra2010 replied...
Mar. 1, 2011 at 1:20 pm :
pleese make more sence
 
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KylaS said...
Feb. 25, 2011 at 9:40 am:
I really like how short and sweet this piece is. Powerful, but no gaudy words to get in the way. Beautiful idea that all people can relate to!(:
 
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abbymac said...
Feb. 25, 2011 at 8:01 am:
I like how simple, yet powerful this poem is. Great job.
 
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laylasstory said...
Feb. 7, 2011 at 11:17 pm:
I wish you continued writing more because it's very promising and I really like it. But the last verse just cut the flow to it. 
 
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sweetdollsarah said...
Feb. 7, 2011 at 7:42 pm:
It was a good poem but it was simple...too plain add some funk or a big bang at the ending make us feel what you felt when you rote it make us feel your words your mood your atmoshere so that we aren't reading just empty words.
 
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ShelbyMarie93 said...
Feb. 7, 2011 at 2:50 pm:
Nice idea. However, I think it would have been much, MUCH better if you had elaborated on the idea. Make it longer...captivate your reader. Make us SEE and FEEL your idea, not just read it...
 
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Kiyoko This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 16, 2011 at 3:34 pm:
Nice Metaphor. I think that the last line is weak, though. Like there's no real significance or "oomph" to it. 
 
bobhot6 replied...
Jan. 16, 2011 at 10:22 pm :
I disagree. I think the fact that the conclusion is so simple and concise makes the piece very powerful. The author could've just as easily tried to stretch the ending out with a jumble of words, be he/she got the point across with  3 simple words. Nice work!!
 
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wyatt_r said...
Dec. 3, 2010 at 9:55 pm:
i only read this over once and didnt really proccess it but i could feel the depth
 
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Peniel said...
Dec. 3, 2010 at 4:36 pm:
this is a really nice poem it says alot even if its so short
 
silentvocal replied...
Jan. 16, 2011 at 6:35 pm :
I agree because the words just seem to flow, even though it's brief it's all that's been like encased in it u know? like such a dense concept and the selected wording. I do like it-it's something you could sit on for a while just thinking about.
 
-LeftBehindBroken- replied...
Oct. 29, 2011 at 6:16 pm :
Very true. I can feel the same way, and the feelings that you are expressing are great. Don't be afraid to write anything!
 
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