Whale Song MAG

January 3, 2009
By Jaden Gragg GOLD, Shawnee, Kansas
Jaden Gragg GOLD, Shawnee, Kansas
17 articles 0 photos 0 comments

I have never heard it, phantom whale calls,
so deep they make one cringe, so shrill they make one cry,
except before I was born.

I know,
before I developed the lips, eyelashes, fingers, brain,
I have now,
I lived in the ocean,
I floated like a little walnut,
I was the simplest creature,
I heard the whale song.
This makes me wonder,
was it only I who received this gift,
or was it you also?

Giant whales, so big, beyond my comprehension,
peaceful beauties,
we have killed you all.
We stabbed and raped and took
for no good reason.
We took our ships,
I take blame somehow, I feel so awful,
we sharpened sticks and killed your
families
peace
your song traveled across the ocean,
you swam together for centuries through the deep,
mystic water.
What were you saying? Were you speaking through god?
Are you god?
I think we should worship you.
You blinked your eyes slowly, and your tears melted
with the ocean
We drank your blood with greedy slurps.
Are we evolution’s mistake?

I want to learn your song.
My race will never learn,
I am so lost with my race.
If I could trade in my clumsy legs and sharp words,
I would gladly accept your fins and godly
demeanor.



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This article has 49 comments.


on Jul. 6 2012 at 11:59 am
hippiechick99 GOLD, Mesquite, Texas
11 articles 0 photos 224 comments

Favorite Quote:
"... How dreary to be somebody-- How public like a frog;
To tell one's name; the livelong June-- To an admiring bog"
-Emily Dickinson

This isn't my beliefs on some parts of this. I do believe humans can be cruel and harsh and discusting.... This poem is just breathtaking, keep writing :)

on Jun. 14 2012 at 1:40 pm
AlwaysAntlers SILVER, Kingsport, Tennessee
5 articles 0 photos 72 comments

Favorite Quote:
“Don't forget - no one else sees the world the way you do, so no one else can tell the stories that you have to tell.”
― Charles de Lint, (from his book,The Blue Girl)

This is just plain beautiful. The lines really seem to flow, and it seems really deep. It sort of reminds me of "Broken Horse", by the Freelance Whales.

on May. 23 2012 at 4:00 pm
radicalhonesty GOLD, Alpharetta, Georgia
12 articles 2 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
There is no situation, facet, or aspect of life that cannot be improved with pizza. -Daria

While I don't agree with this poem, it's beautifully written.

HHHaustin said...
on May. 2 2012 at 10:44 am
I liked the metaphors and similes you put into it and the stanzas.

mickeymouse said...
on May. 1 2012 at 2:23 pm
In your poem I loved how you used a cliche to keep putting yourself in the poem. I also liked how you compared yourself to things like a nut floating on water.

emilar said...
on May. 1 2012 at 10:38 am
This poem was beautiful, I am amazed how you made it all flow together. The talent you put into this is amazing. Keep writeing you are good.

thesoupguy said...
on May. 1 2012 at 10:29 am
The poem was great, it had great rhythm! it had good figurative language like iambic pentameter.

on May. 1 2012 at 10:25 am
This is a very inspirational poem. I loved how the rhythm just flowed perfectly. They way you compaired God and the whale moved me. I loved how you used free verse instead of rhyme which is way over used. I just loved it.

on May. 1 2012 at 10:24 am
maggie_m BRONZE, Waterford, Wisconsin
1 article 0 photos 3 comments
Great job! I liked the metaphor you used and the different stanzas were good to. keep writing!

on May. 1 2012 at 10:22 am
Your poem has great rhythm, and it sounded like Shakespear's iambic pentameter.

sydzue said...
on May. 1 2012 at 7:51 am
Your poem was really good, very expresive, very convincing, very inspriring! In each verse I could see what you meant clearly! All the metaphors were heard, and expressed your thoughts greatly.

Indilove GOLD said...
on May. 1 2012 at 7:49 am
Indilove GOLD, Kenockee, Michigan
17 articles 0 photos 71 comments

Favorite Quote:
No one is your strength or guidance. If life is what you wish to live then do not bind your soul to something unreal. The creater nor the keeper can heal you for it is blind faith that leads you.

This is truly amazing! Great work its so deep I could really feel all the emotion you put into this. It's so true too! This is just so awesome completly and truly ur an amazing writer

Fia-fia BRONZE said...
on Jan. 12 2012 at 3:27 pm
Fia-fia BRONZE, Bethesda, Maryland
4 articles 1 photo 157 comments
Inspiring, beautiful and all around amazing. This is lovely. The rhythm is fantastic and the poem itself is moving. Great perspective.. Thank you :)

byebye said...
on Nov. 29 2011 at 7:30 pm
byebye, Nevermore, Other
0 articles 0 photos 253 comments
So do I! Beautiful poem.

byebye said...
on Nov. 29 2011 at 7:30 pm
byebye, Nevermore, Other
0 articles 0 photos 253 comments
Beautiful. I LOVE this poem - it is so well worded and flows along beautifully. Don't stop writing - ever! You have potential to be great. Also, would anyone consider looking at my work and posting some comments? I could REALLY use the feedback! :)

on Nov. 7 2011 at 7:41 pm
Ada Dolan-Zalaznick SILVER, New York, New York
9 articles 0 photos 7 comments
I totally agree! It does seem like it was written in blue...

on Sep. 2 2011 at 6:03 pm
itstoohardtothink BRONZE, London, Other
2 articles 0 photos 1 comment
I think a poem can communicate a feeling before you've even understood the word properly, just by the rhythm and structure.  Yours is so somber and melancholy, it's as if it's written in blue.

Ayme S. said...
on Aug. 19 2011 at 12:09 pm
I can only say: woah!

on May. 15 2011 at 7:23 am
trademarkoperation SILVER, Lake Peekskill, New York
9 articles 7 photos 22 comments

Favorite Quote:
Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dreams with open eyes, to make it possible. ~T.E. Lawrence

This reminds me of one of my favorite songs - Broken Horse by Freelance Whales. It's a beautiful poem with great language - keep it up!

babyfacejack said...
on Apr. 6 2011 at 12:27 pm
this poem has good figurative language and good imagery and i like whales




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