The wallpaper in my

      room is like mason jar eyes,

  like a baby

     choking on its boredom.

I'd love

   to splash it with black,

         to match

the sky

    and aches it leaves,

to nudge towards

  a happy life

and never let it be.

           A while ago

it was a blue

  but it never went

with anything,

         and a year ago

is gone,

             for now,

and nothing goes

with anything.

          I spend an hour

laughing at the bedroom dresser,

             watching you

and choking on myself,

trying to

          find the right

paint to match

         the mood

so I can go to

                 sleep.