scared of whats next | Teen Ink

scared of whats next

August 18, 2014
By Anonymous

I just can’t sit back and watch a friend sit there and hurt themselves and not do nothing. I know she is mad at me but I had to do the right thing and I’m worried for her it breaks my heart that she is doing this to herself. I know from expensive that it not something you want to get addicted to I self-harmed for 9 years and not till the last 3 years no one did nothing in and out of Brentwood . different therapist every week . going to doctor apt. almost every day not knowing what I was going to do next , it’s not fun I know she is going through a lot of stuff but it scary place to be in. don’t what her to be in the same situation I was in a little over two months ago I had to be transported to the hospital because I had cut to deep and was losing a lot of blood. And I ended up have to have a blood transfusion because I lost so much in an inch long cut that was 1\2 inch deep. Self-harm is deadly this thing just takes over your body and you have no control cut after cut deeper and deeper they go. I just can’t sit there and watch her slowly kill herself it’s not fun place to be in. at this point I don’t know what to do because she is telling them no she didn’t do it but I saw where she did it and they are pretty deep. Now I know what it feels like on the other side and I can’t believe all the pain I put my family and friends through because I can stop thinking about it and I’m scared she is going to do it again I’m scared that she is going to cut really deep and not notice it and bleed to death. I love her and I told her I was going to have to tell somebody about and that she not going to do this and me just to watch her slowly waste away. She is my best friend and she is just going to ruin her life I am 15 and finally now getting my life back 9 long years I have been fighting I know self-harm is going to be a part of me the rest of my life and I have come to the acceptance that it makes me who I am now. And I don’t want that to be a part of her life and it take her life from her because it took mine away. She is goanna sit there and laugh about it, it not a funny matter it something serous and not something to play around with I don’t know what to do.


The author's comments:
i have recoved from self harm and i just found out that my bestfriend is doing it it sucks to be on the otherside

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