sunshine MAG

December 10, 2008
By Dakota Davis SILVER, Westwood, Kansas
Dakota Davis SILVER, Westwood, Kansas
8 articles 0 photos 0 comments

first of all

he wouldn’t dance around anyone’s question
or make anyone smile
and everybody would hate him

he wouldn’t have made friends with the ­exacto knife he used to cut his grip tape
and she wouldn’t have carved up her arm with a safety pin on new year’s when she was drunk and he broke up with her

and i wouldn’t want to kill overdramatic girls and space-invading boys
i would just want them not
to be alive
anymore

i would
capture the neon red sign in a bar
and make it my favorite color

there would be no feelings of
“the band has a singer, they don’t need me”

freedom and socialist democracy would be
easier done
than said

there’d be an awful lot of
“but either way, man, i’m glad you came.”

girls wouldn’t sit by the toilet and erase everything they ate that day

and he would come back to visit and say
“in some ways, kansas city is more real than clearwater”

we would get to go make brownies at his house on a tuesday
we would “escape our simple lives” and play

that night, you would have watched the stars instead of the people
you wouldn’t care if they all knew your name

your bottle of kahlua and your “best” friends wouldn’t be the only thing you had
at the end of the day

people would lie on their trampolines and watch the sunset
which was painted blood orange

he would buy me a bag of cherries from apple market and we would walk to the price chopper and change in 3,000 pennies for $28
that would be something i’d make happen again

when you and your boyfriend walk in the rain
and your makeup comes off
he’d say
“you look pretty”

good-byes would be easier
because we would always be able to say hello again

people would be proud of what they
are
instead of desperately trying to fit into ­something they
are not

summer would last forever
and we would always smell like chlorine and green grass and sun and cherry popsicles
and be happy

people would all have the ability to
find the simplistic beauty
in an ugly and complex world

i’d be your sunshine
your only sunshine
i’d make you happy
when skies are gray



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This article has 24 comments.


on Mar. 4 2013 at 10:06 am
ash57999 SILVER, Pewaukee, Wisconsin
6 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A room without books is like a body without a soul" -Marcus Tullius Cicero

This piece is simply amazing!  It painted a picture in my mind, line bring a new image.  It's beautiful.

SpyceChik GOLD said...
on Jan. 9 2013 at 5:37 pm
SpyceChik GOLD, Accra, Other
14 articles 0 photos 41 comments

Favorite Quote:
If it must be done, it must be done well.

oh wow....i love this! Great work!  

Kayte BRONZE said...
on Oct. 15 2011 at 10:11 am
Kayte BRONZE, Sandy, Utah
3 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God's kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile."
-Mother Teresa

I got chills reading this, and never wanted it to end. This is amazing. Amazing.

on Jan. 8 2011 at 5:26 pm
Jessie-Mo SILVER, Mo. City, Texas
6 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get."

Wow, this poem is amazing. If only the world could be like that. You have an amazing talent, please continue to write.

on Dec. 23 2010 at 3:36 pm
ShelbyMarie93 PLATINUM, Lexington, Nebraska
35 articles 1 photo 62 comments

Favorite Quote:
"When Death to either shall come -- I pray it be first to me." ~Robert Bridges
or
"Life is not a jump; it's a headfirst dive."
or
"Within you I lose myself; without you I find myself wanting to be lost again."

╔══╗
╚╗╔╝
╔╝(¯`v´¯)
╚══`.¸.Isaac H.

I can only say...wow!

DiceBaby GOLD said...
on Jul. 1 2010 at 12:19 am
DiceBaby GOLD, Hartford, Connecticut
18 articles 7 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn

wow this poem completely took my breath away. you are a true artist and you have completed the mission of every artist out there.... to truely say something... to make a powerful statement about the world we live in. this poem is deffinetly one of my top favs of all time!!

on Apr. 25 2010 at 9:05 pm
possiblylindsey GOLD, Keller, Texas
12 articles 12 photos 74 comments

Favorite Quote:
"see? if i liked chris drew, id end up like randy. 5 foot 1 and vegetarian. vegetarians arent men." -camden
"what are you grinnin' at?" - mr. martinez
"you just cant recreate stupid." - jacob

oh. my. goodness. this is amazing. i love it. it hurts sometimes, it makes you smile sometimes, and it ends so abruptly, youre just left thinking, "whoa." i love this. so much.

on Mar. 12 2010 at 10:04 am
Literalist17 SILVER, Monte Vista, Colorado
7 articles 0 photos 25 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Tact is, of course, only for those who lack the wit to possess sarcasm"

I honestly have not heard something that well written and so deep in such a long time. bravo *claps hands*

on Mar. 10 2010 at 6:24 pm
Thethinker. SILVER, Central Islip, New York
7 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Aspire and you will astound."

that was beautifulll.... :D

i loved it!!!

on Mar. 8 2010 at 9:59 am
nutmegc1992 SILVER, Oldenburg, Indiana
5 articles 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
"All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream." -Edgar Allan Poe

wow. this was is amazing i love it. and i understand where youre coming from.

on Mar. 8 2010 at 9:40 am
missca1229 GOLD, North Tonawanda, New York
11 articles 5 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life makes my heart sing

It's deffinately good. I love your work =]

on Mar. 3 2010 at 9:47 am
noelleism PLATINUM, Russellville, Alabama
24 articles 0 photos 81 comments

Favorite Quote:
I can not dwell on the past, and I will not live on what the future may hold, but yet take comfort and find perpose in the second yet to come.

I alomst stoped reading after the first 4 stanzas but I kept reading and I liked it a lot. It dose make me smile and want for summer and my fav line is 'Summer would last forever and we would smell like chlorine and green grass and sun and cherry popsicles and be happy.' You really got out that feeling and made everyone smell and taste summer. lol :)

on Feb. 27 2010 at 9:52 pm
earthy_kat GOLD, Sebree, Kentucky
17 articles 1 photo 34 comments

Favorite Quote:
"My heart has joined the Thousand, for my friend stopped running today." - Hazel from the book Watership Down (by Richard Adams).

Hope you don't find me nosy. I swear I'm not snooping. I am not earthykat. I'm earthykat's mother, and accomplished poet of 23 years. I just had to comment after reading this particular poem. I really liked it! It was a bit longwinded in some places, but appropriately so in most cases. I especially loved these lines, "summer would last forever

and we would always smell like chlorine and green grass and sun and cherry popsicles

and be happy."

Very moving, and you included so many of our senses. Well done, indeed! Good luck with your poetic future. Whatever you do, don't stop writing. =)

LuzA. GOLD said...
on Feb. 22 2010 at 2:10 pm
LuzA. GOLD, Santo Domingo, Other
13 articles 0 photos 22 comments
OMG Great Jobb!!! :O :D

CJade said...
on Feb. 17 2010 at 1:26 pm
This made me smile and wish for summer. There's an honest and almost simple beauty to this that I really admired. Parts of it seemed to be from your life, and though I didn't understand the references, they only made it more personal and sincere.

on Feb. 12 2010 at 6:13 pm
forget_me_not SILVER, Chesapeake, Virginia
8 articles 0 photos 30 comments
wow this is was incredible. i think you commented on a piece of mine and asked if i look at yours and give my opinion. well here i am. and may i say you a an incredible poet with incredible poetry. if you get a chance and could look at some of my other work that'd be great. thanks

Saadat GOLD said...
on Feb. 1 2010 at 2:44 pm
Saadat GOLD, Ventnor, New Jersey
15 articles 0 photos 9 comments
This isn't just poetry, it's art. And what a talented artist you are =]

on Jan. 26 2010 at 8:53 pm
B.R.Nack SILVER, Grand Junction, Colorado
5 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
“...Monsters are real, and ghosts are real too. They live inside us, and sometimes, they win.”
--Stephen King

that was amazing you have great talent keep writing please^^

on Dec. 29 2009 at 9:57 am
mellow_melon PLATINUM, Jefferson, Maryland
41 articles 14 photos 67 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but my the number of moments that take our breath away."

love it. especially the last stanza, thats the best part. good job your a great writer :)

on Nov. 18 2009 at 7:12 pm
oh my god. I love this lots and lots. it connects to so many things


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