Happy is too Hopeful | Teen Ink

Happy is too Hopeful

June 21, 2014
By Ashers101 DIAMOND, Lebanon, Pennsylvania
Ashers101 DIAMOND, Lebanon, Pennsylvania
54 articles 0 photos 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
I don't want to be like everyone else, I want to be me. I won't walk with all of you on the ground because I can fly. -My own quote


Once upon a time
There was a girl
She didn't know how to be okay
Being happy was a stretch
It seemed so easy for everyone else
So why did she struggles to put a smile on her face
Was it the constant doubt
In herself and everything else
Or maybe what she saw
When she looked in the mirror
She looked beyond what people said was beauty
To every imperfection
Until she saw herself
As a whole-
Mismatched and far from pretty
She saw an outcast
Someone who would never fit in
She never wanted to be popular
She just wanted friends
Friends, she found
But she learned too quickly
No one is really how they seem
I don't know why she wasn't ever happy
Maybe because every time something went wrong
She thought it was her fault
So she carved her skin with her nails
Only if she knew what a bad habit that was
As she got older
And learned to mask her imperfections
With makeup and cool clothes
She learned to mask her sadness
With fake smiles and false hope
I never met a girl so desperate
So desperate to be loved
To be accepted
Too bad no one really loved her
No one really accepted her
That's why she cried
Until the tears stopped coming
But she didn't know real heartache yet
No, for now she'd fine her escape in revisiting old habits
Trading her nails for a blade
In time, those scars would fade
Few would ever know
She wasn't asking for attention
Or was she?
Maybe she wanted to fit in
To the wrong kind of crowd
What a pity
Why go to all that trouble
For girls with hearts of stone
No, don't feel sorry for her
She did have on friend
And she eventually found another
For a year, she was actually happy
Or at least, I'd like to believe she was
She was content
She thought she fit in
I didn't have the heart to tell her
Girls like her never find a permanent place
Silly for her to believe
Stupid for her to get comfortable
Se had to learn
So she slipped and fell
Only this time with more grace
She managed to keep a smile on her face
As if nothing happened
Lucky she was
That a blonde-haired boy
Came to keep the smile there
Naive she was to believe
He wouldn't be the one
To leave with that pretty smile of hers

Once upon a time,
There was a girl
Damaged and distraught
Who stumbled across a boy
It didn't take long for her to fall again
Regardless of the ache
That started in her heart
The ache that crippled her inside
No she was stubborn
So she took the boy
She took him and ran
Now she thinks with constant distraction
The whisper of his lips on hers
His hand in hers
I can't get through to her
But I am holding her back
"Don't trust your hope
Stupid girl, it only hurts you"
I may be holding her back
But if she was smart,
She would have left by now
I know how broken she already is
Who knows what he could do
With her beaten heart in his hand
My heart in his hand

Once upon a time,
I told myself a story
And I cried because I want to be happy



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