Between Rails MAG

November 16, 2008
By Hannah Melville- Weatherbee, SO. Freeport, ME

Peter Pan never showed up
to punch your ticket to Neverland.
So please don’t wait on the tracks anymore.
Don’t linger on those rocks, they’ll burn your feet.
I’ve walked the rails, followed them
not to the end, just to the next station.
But there I found a half-cent tax on penny candy
and a river of pre-used ticker-tape.
So maybe, instead, you should send in your résumé,
Ask Captain Hook for that ticket to Neverland
And cross the tracks to wait for him,
to see if he shows up.



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This article has 15 comments.


on Oct. 20 2011 at 11:14 am
deleteddeletedFoff, Columbus, Ohio
0 articles 0 photos 53 comments
bravo. reworking the last line to fit into the beat would make it even better.

roxygirl14 said...
on Dec. 11 2010 at 6:18 pm
wow.....definitly amazenn

AnonyMiss GOLD said...
on Nov. 2 2010 at 8:18 pm
AnonyMiss GOLD, Houston, Texas
16 articles 1 photo 30 comments
i love the whole thing about neverland, but also the fact that this conveys a sort of.....brokeness. awesome job

on Sep. 13 2010 at 6:28 pm
yogagurl BRONZE, Marathon, Florida
2 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A true friend is somene who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

such a cool poem def my fave so different and beautuiful

on Aug. 28 2010 at 10:13 pm
Marlyre PLATINUM, Kalamazoo, Michigan
21 articles 0 photos 208 comments

Favorite Quote:
"when you cry, do you waste your tears?" Madonna

it seems to me that it is almost comparing religion and the devil... in some weird way, many possible interpretations.... read some of mine?

on May. 10 2010 at 4:38 pm
Egyptiangirl13 GOLD, Kansas City, Missouri
14 articles 0 photos 501 comments

Favorite Quote:
\"either write something worth reading or do something worth writing. -Benjamin Franklin

\"If columbus would have turned back, no one would have blamed him. No one would have remembered him either.\"

\"If music be the food of love, play on.\"

that was awesome-i love how you incorperated peter pan. BUt wouldl you mind telling me your message so i can compare it to what i think yours is?

Kay4theRoses said...
on Mar. 2 2010 at 9:20 am
Kay4theRoses, O&#39brien, Florida
0 articles 0 photos 75 comments

Favorite Quote:
"all's fair in love and war." And "Beware of a fat man whose belly doesn't jiggle when he laughs."-A Chinese philosopher. =)

i love the new percpective.

ive put up new stuff if people will comment and rate?

i'd appreciate the constructive critisim.

twi_fan_17 said...
on Feb. 28 2010 at 7:49 am
You can tell that this was an orignal. Very well writen.

on Jan. 15 2010 at 6:07 pm
DestinyMartinez PLATINUM, Boca Raton, Florida
23 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Never know that you love someone untill they're gone."

Wow, this is really good. I love the detail in this. You’re a great writer. You should really check out some of my writing I think you will like it. Our writing is similar in a way. Please comment and rate too. Thank you.

onlyiz said...
on Nov. 15 2009 at 8:59 pm
onlyiz, Boulder, Colorado
0 articles 1 photo 86 comments

Favorite Quote:
“You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” - Mark Twain

so strong.

i thought it was original and well written.

on Sep. 11 2009 at 8:37 pm
Inkspired PLATINUM, Whitby, Other
26 articles 0 photos 493 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If one will scoff at the study of language, how, save in terms of language, will one scoff?" - Mario Pei
"I write for the same reason I breathe - because if I didn't, I would die." Isaac Asimov

Really, really deep, really original. Well written, and I love it!

Jennax3 SILVER said...
on Aug. 20 2009 at 3:29 am
Jennax3 SILVER, Palos Verdes Estates, California
6 articles 0 photos 114 comments
This is so cute! The references to Peter Pan are brilliant. :)

Schubster said...
on Aug. 20 2009 at 2:08 am
luv how u connect Peter Pan into your poem :)

on Aug. 19 2009 at 3:52 pm
Meredith Munro SILVER, Spring Lake, New Jersey
9 articles 0 photos 12 comments
Wow, that's deep. I love it! You have some serious talent.

on Aug. 16 2009 at 3:40 am
aspiring.author.09 PLATINUM, Beaumont, Other
34 articles 0 photos 70 comments
Very intense. I really loved it, great work!


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