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The Color Red

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Red is the peck of love's kiss on your collar
bead of blood creeping from a graze
fever racing to your cheeks when livid
char of sun scorching your skin at the beach
crunch of your teeth piercing an apple
delicate velvet of a rose in bloom
psalm of a bird at the window
metallic taste coating your tongue once bitten
flutter of your heart when caressed
Red is your most potent emotions



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ObeyyHailey said...
Sep. 23 at 6:05 pm
I thought it was amazing! But you should add just a few more descriptive words! Otherwise beautifully written and I've read some of your other stuff and your an amazing writter! Please dont stop!
 
SaphiraBrightscalesThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Mar. 29 at 11:44 am
HEY EMMA! WOW. This. Poem. I. Just. Loved. You described the colour red ever so perfectly and I cannot say anything more then the fact that I adored all your words in this one. Also the last line was a perfect ending. And I love the colour red. AND HEY I gotta share this with my best friend, whose favourite colour is red too! ^_^
 
megcmusicThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jan. 8 at 10:52 pm
This is good. It could be a little better, you couldv'e added some more emotion into it. The lack of capalitization is going to bug me, but I still enjoyed it.
 
EmmaClaire0823This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Jan. 9 at 10:03 am
I didn't want to put emotion into this piece, because it isn't emotional. This poem is about describing what the color red is to a blind person. Not the emotion behind the color. If I writing as if I were blind I would put emotion into it, but I didn't write it that way. And Red is the only word captialized for a reason. 
 
BandGeekAndProudThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 7 at 7:07 pm
Honestly, there isn't much I have to criticze about this poem, except I would say to use less "SAT-style" words. I know they're very descriptive, but they clutter up a poem and get between a reader and the emotions. The way I think of it is that emotions are raw and powerful and natural, and the simplest words can describe them the best. It was already a very good poem, I just think it could have been even better. By the way, I love your prompt - I may try to write a color poem... (more »)
 
carolineklepper said...
Dec. 21, 2013 at 7:22 am
Absolutely beautiful. I love the sensory details. Very descriptive.
 
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