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Summer Bliss

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In the soft, lush green,
I settle under the welcoming shade of a tree,
gazing up at the endless, sparkling sky
accompanied by clouds, stretched and faded.

A gentle breeze plays with the shadows,
swaying them back and forth, slowly.

The sun glows with the warmth
of a friend,
enveloping me in summer bliss.



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TheGirlUnknownThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Oct. 8 at 1:04 pm
Beautimus!  
 
AlyciaL. said...
Jan. 17 at 6:18 pm
I love the imagery here! Such a great poem!
 
EmmaClaire0823This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jan. 7 at 12:14 pm
This paints a good image of summer. I would use a wider vocabulary for your adjectives. Also, the poem seems a little rushed and choppy. I think this is a very relatable topic. Good job overall. 
 
SeamanGlori said...
Jan. 4 at 3:02 pm
Its simplicity makes it beautiful. Fantastic work! However maybe use words that aren't so common, so the idea of "Summer Bliss" doesn't seem as ordinary. 
 
writing.is.my.life. said...
Dec. 30, 2013 at 3:13 pm
I like this a lot.  It describes what you're trying to convey beautifully. A little choppy, but overall it's gorgeous writing! (:
 
GuardianoftheStarsThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 28, 2013 at 10:27 pm
This was very well written.  I really liked the image you chose. It helped me picture the words more easily. 
 
Cat521 said...
Dec. 28, 2013 at 8:17 pm
There is a beautiful imagery about the piece that allows you to vizualize. Some phrasing seems a little choppy creating small gaps in the image. But it paints a beautiful picture, you really are an artist with words. 
 
live_luv_laugh_inspireThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Dec. 28, 2013 at 9:00 pm
thank you, yes I noticed that! do you have any suggestions for how I could make that better?:)
 
EvetteT said...
Dec. 27, 2013 at 6:47 pm
  Great
 
AngelaAxl said...
Dec. 27, 2013 at 5:04 pm
Very nice!
 
mollybug13 said...
Dec. 25, 2013 at 11:03 pm
I love this! It feels like im actually there. Im giving you 5 stars. :)
 
megcmusicThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Dec. 20, 2013 at 8:22 pm
good poem... i really like it!
 
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