Don’t You Wish You Could Cut Yourself Out of Your Skin? MAG

July 16, 2013
By laceandcoffee PLATINUM, Rio Rancho, New Mexico
laceandcoffee PLATINUM, Rio Rancho, New Mexico
21 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"We make up horrors to help us escape from the real ones."- Stephen King
"But I don't want comfort. I want God, I want poetry. I want danger, I want freedom, I want goodness. I want sin."- Aldous Huxley


sometimes I feel as if
my soul
is trapped inside
tangles of ruthless
rugged bone
wrapped in a
blanket of thick
sandpaper skin

these muscles have
a mind of their own
their fingers shove
food down my
throat and
drag blades
across my skin

I feel that if I
could just slit open
my belly
unwrap my thick
wool of skin
pull out my stuffing
and untangle
my bones

my soul could
stretch its legs
and yawn
and finally be free
happy even


The author's comments:
Just a look inside my disturbed mind.

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This article has 9 comments.


OldYoungOne said...
on Aug. 5 2013 at 9:21 am
It's like a beautiful car crash. That's more than what i thought it could be. It went from being a norm topic to something even more special. You have expressed what many teen s feel but in a original way sort of. With your description of language you have encompassed the read in something this poem feelingthe pain and irratation and the complete longing to be free (in death possibly). You are indeed talented.

on Aug. 1 2013 at 1:16 pm
Cutey-Beauty SILVER, Ulaanbaator, Other
6 articles 0 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
Soli Deo Gloria.

This poem is so sad, because it is so horrifyling true and at the same time, so beautiful. I honestly can't critize anything but the punctuation. I LOVE LOVE LOVE the strong language use and the different methaphors and mental images you use for this poem. I must say, I feel like this a lot. Like my soul, like my spirit just wants to be rid of my body and step out in freedom. I guess thats what heaven will be like....KEEP WRITING! YOU"RE AWESOME! :D

on Jul. 29 2013 at 8:23 pm
Carpe-Caffeam GOLD, No Where, Florida
10 articles 0 photos 445 comments

Favorite Quote:
“If it weren’t for the coffee, I’d have no identifiable personality whatsoever.” –David Letterman

Yeah, I used to feel this way, too. For me, this poem brings back a ton of depressing memories, but I understand where you're coming from. Writing used to be my way of venting about my depression instead of showing it externally (e.g. self-harm). Anyways, feelings aside, I love the imagery you have in here, especially the stuffing metaphor. Amazing job, and keep up the good work!

on Jul. 29 2013 at 10:43 am
BlackbeltJames GOLD, Reading, Other
14 articles 0 photos 193 comments

Favorite Quote:
Isaac Asimov - "Intelligence is an accident of evolution, and not necessarily an advantage.”

This poem has a lot of potential, it is creative and enlightening, as well as emotive as you use such strong language to portray how you feel. The language is very good, however the lack of punctuation means that there is a lack of a tempo or a flow with the words and the reader would run out of breath (if reading out loud). The poem would sound much better and be more effective with the correct punction. Apart from that this was a very promising poem with a big effect.

Also I would not say that your mind is disturbed, your discription is but that is to portray the extremety of it and to make the poem have an impact; how you feel is up to you but it is not disturbing, it is merely natural as a lot of people go through the same thing within the modern world.

on Jul. 28 2013 at 10:58 am
Labradorian PLATINUM, Chicago, Illinois
34 articles 0 photos 52 comments
Again, powerful word chioce. I admire your ability to match your words to the emotions portayed. Like Casmir, I do beleive that your poem could benifit from punctuation, at least in the ending lines. It was a pretty smooth read up untill then. (in my head it sounded like free happy even, which didn't make sense, and can easily be fixed with a period.)

on Jul. 27 2013 at 6:48 pm
CasimirPulaski SILVER, Columbia, Connecticut
5 articles 0 photos 10 comments
I think that with added punctuation and capitalization this poem could really fly! for me, when there is non present i struggle to find the natural pauses intended by the author, but if you read it aloud once how you intended it, read it again the same way only this time marking where you emphasize things or take pauses then add them in formally, it can make a whole world of difference! This is a brave respectable poem.

on Jul. 26 2013 at 2:36 pm
RozaAlexander, Amory, Mississippi
0 articles 0 photos 67 comments

Favorite Quote:
rumors are carried by haters, spread by fools, & accepted by idiots.

Wow, I'm totally speachless. This is just amazing i really love it.

on Jul. 26 2013 at 11:50 am
TheSkyOwesMeRain GOLD, Irvine, California
13 articles 1 photo 303 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life isn't measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments which take your breath away.

You are only as strong as your weakest link.

Great work! I love the imagery :)

Mckay ELITE said...
on Jul. 24 2013 at 4:52 pm
Mckay ELITE, Somewhere, Virginia
146 articles 0 photos 2260 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do."
—Apple’s “Think Different” commercial, 1997
“Crazy people are considered mad by the rest of the society only because their intelligence isn't understood.”
― Weihui Zhou

I don't think this is weird or demented as some people might think. I'm fascinated really. Because I feel the same way. Like every day of the week. I love the imagery of this poem. The title definitely captures the attention of the reader right away. Congrats on the Editors' Chioce! They're such an honor. Very memorable poem.


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