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your long hair billows
like the loose wrinkles
in the ocean’s haggard face
beneath you
sleek slate dolphins
blithely leap
in and out of the ocean
answering your enraptured whoop
with a language of their own
you extend your arms out
like a crucified deity
your inquisitive eyes searching
the limits of the ocean
around you
but at this moment
as the ocean is limitless
so are you
the world is yours



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HazelGrace said...
Jul. 24, 2013 at 8:25 pm
YOUR DESCRPTION MAKES ME WISH I HAD BEEN ON THE TITANIC EXPERINCING THAT MOMENT EVEN THOUGH I WOULD DIE LATER I WOULDNT CARE
 
HazelGrace replied...
Jul. 24, 2013 at 8:25 pm
Like in a good way 
 
MckayThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jul. 25, 2013 at 3:46 pm
I so wish I'd been there. Can't happen now. Maybe when the film was being shot, and just beofre everyone dies, I'd be like, "Okay, I gotta go, James Cameron." Then everyone but Rose, and those other pompous biotches, die. Thank you, HazelGrace. 
 
LexusMarieThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jul. 22, 2013 at 8:08 pm
BRAH. You are king of the poetry world. While I am sure I say this about almost every poem of yours, this one is one of my favorites, I mean I LOVE this poem. And when I read the author's comment I was so very happy and I knew I was going to love this poem. This poem feels as real as the emotion in the movie does and makes me love the poem more. I love the fact that you refer to someone as a 'deity' it reminds me of the mythology book I am reading right now. I think the amount of lin... (more »)
 
LexusMarieThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Jul. 22, 2013 at 8:11 pm
How many times can Lexus say 'love/d' in her comment? Let's see, one.. two.. three.. four.. five. And I only used 10 sentences. Jeeze. For like every two sentences there is the use of the word love. DON'T JUDGE ME, BRAH.. I LOVE THIS POEM. That makes six. I'm outta here before I use 'it' again.
 
MckayThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jul. 23, 2013 at 5:45 pm
Brah, thank you. I was so happy when I wrote this. I wasn't sure if I should've added another stanza or not, based on Rose's perspective. But I'm just so happy this poem ended the way it did. I wanted to dedicate it to the fans of that film. I love it, even though it took me 18 yrs. to finally watch it. But I'm so happy. I tried remembering every scene. And that one just stuck out the most. I wanted people to feel limitless as well while reading this. And I won't judge yo... (more »)
 
LexusMarieThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Jul. 23, 2013 at 6:58 pm
Omg, you should absolutely write another poem from Rose's perspective, I'm glad you only wrote this poem from Jack's because that's all it needed, but yes, from Rose's next. But, why, why did my home girl have to let go! It took me a long time to watch the movie too, the funny thing is.. story time: so, my bestfriend was born in Mexico and she and her mom speaks English but with her thick Spanish accent and so she and I watched Titanic for the first time together and her... (more »)
 
MckayThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jul. 24, 2013 at 3:13 pm
That's hilarious. Sad but hilarious. I will try. It'll be tough to come up with something. The film is just so beautiful. I saw it at my cousin's house with my mom. Everyone else was doing something else. My dad already seen it at thier house, and didn't like the fact that Jack (SPOILER TO ANYONE WHO HASN'T WATCHED IT) didn't climb on the door (WHICH MYTH BUSTERS PROVED HE COULD'VE CLIMBED ON IT WITH ROSE AS WELL AND SURVIVED—WHY JAMES CAMERON—WHY? >.&g... (more »)
 
Labradorian This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 1, 2013 at 7:53 pm
I love the freedom expressed in this poem - your style and vocabulary really accentuate it. My favorite line was probably "...billows like loose wrinkels in the ocean's tattared face". It was so... unique I was startled into rereading the line, and then the poem.
 
MckayThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 2, 2013 at 4:01 pm
I can't believe this poem had such an effect on you. Honestly, that flatters me. And makes me want to make better poetry. Thank you, Labradorian. 
 
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