I was cramped in the tiny shack of a beach house,
despising summer and the beach itself.
The feeling of apprehension once stepping in the muddy water,
not knowing what Lovecraftian creature was slithering across my feet,
of the gritty sand encasing you in a tomb once you walked out.

I had grown used to the monotonous process of summer until then;
But that day was different.
I had been lead outside to meet someone who was like me.
I was unsure if we would truly get along, because
this was the last day before I went home.

I was wrong.
We had the same tastes in nearly everything.
We both shared the fear
of the dark, unsure, unknown.
We abandoned any thoughts holding us back and ran,
plunging into the lukewarm salty mist, waves nearly knocking us over.
We were laughing, splashing around, and eventually floating like jellyfish in the water.

When I left, we promised to speak again.
We did.
We spent a year focusing all our energy on roleplaying,
baking tales of adventure with a teaspoon of
terror
and sprinkle of
romance.
We used each other as a crutch to get along the path of life.

We began to drift apart like two parts of an iceberg splitting;
two strong, cold, individuals, ripped apart by the pressure of the atmosphere,
of others.
You always said you were apathetic; I didn’t quite believe it.
When your account was while you were typing was suspicious.
How could I not question if it was you?
Believing it to be a twisted joke against me, I accused you.

We stopped talking around then.
I was worried about you when you went offline and abandoned all friends.
That’s when I realized
you were gone.
You weren’t coming back;
another vessel tangled in the seaweed of the deep.

It’s been four years now.
I always wonder how you were after that.
You had been depressed to begin with, and knowing you, it probably took a toll on you.
I mull over the question of if I want to know if those were your words;
I would rather not know.
If it was you, my fond memories would be tainted and I’d be hurt.
I sometimes check to see if you’re online, resulting in disappointment.

You will never know this, but you are still a part of me.
I have you to thank for helping me realize who I am as a person, and for all the good times.
It was inevitable for me to later -out of curiousity- check out series that you liked, to realize
I liked them also; I even cosplayed as characters from some of them.
However, I regret not believing you;
my distrust is what sent my ice cap sailing away from you as you drowned, worsening things.
I wonder if we were to meet again, under the never ending sky, could we be friends?