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Johnny Loves Cakes This work is considered exceptional by our editorial staff.

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She's been baking
The evidence is everywhere
She thinks she's sneaky
Covering the scent of baked goods with pine-sol
'Been cleanin' babe?'
'Mmm-hmm just a little dustin' here and there'
The white flour handprints on the back of her jeans would beg to differ
But you'll still act surprised tonight
When she brings out a hastily frosted chocolate cake from the cupboard
You'll cherish every bite
Thinking that somehow her hands make it taste even sweeter
Somehow that wide smile inspires the cake to bake evenly
To taste even more delicious
She's no culinary artist
But you'd eat anything made by those tiny pink hands
You're sure that her hard-as-rock muffins are the best thing you've ever tasted
And you'd pass up a table at a fancy restaurant with a wine list longer than your arm
Just to lick the spoon she's been using to make cherry jello
Now you're sitting across the kitchen table
Watching as she prepares dinner
Pork chops
Rolled in peanut panko bread mix
Steamed asparagus on the side
And you think that its the love
Thats what makes it all taste so good
She bakes her love right in along with the eggs

Grandma Betty's Johnnycakes

Fistful white flour
2 Fistfuls yellow cornmeal
2 Pinches sugar
Pinch salt
Pinch baking soda
Egg tenderly beaten
Cup hot milk

Mix that s*** up
And fry the demons outta it
With a spoonful of lard
Then slather it in syrup
And love

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