Decading

I put on my daily facade,
But than,
I just end up getting,
Hurt again.

How do you think,
I've lost so much?
I'm so afraid,
That I'm out of touch.

Do I hide my pride,
From these bad dreams?
And give into sad thoughts,
That are maddening?

What do I do to,
Ignore them behind me?
Do I follow,
My instincts blindly?

Do I trust them and,
Get fooled by phoniness?
Or do I trust no one and,
Live in loneliness?

If I turn my back,
I'm defenseless,
And to go on blindly,
Seems senseless.

How do you expect,
I will know what to do?
When all I know is,
What you tell me to.

Because I cant hold on,
When I'm stretched so thin,
I make the right moves,
But I'm lost within.