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I Should

When I was born,
I was given a part.
A place to start,
A person to be,
A role to play.
Then, they said,
“Be yourself;
You can be anyone you want to be.”
What does that mean?
What am I supposed to do?
They gave me rules and regulations;
They established goals for me too.
What do I do from here?
Where do I go?
I don’t know what I want.
I don’t know how I feel.
I only understand what I should want, what I should be.
I only understand what I should feel.
As I get older, I should feel more alive.
I should experience more, involve myself in school and relationships
And I do.
I do all of that
Because that’s what I’m meant to do,
But as I get older,
I feel more like a machine.
I’m less alive.
Some way, some how, I’m not doing what I should be.
I am not who I should be.

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