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To Die a Crimson Death

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The weary soldier presses on,
Even though his comrades are gone.
Drearily shuffling to and fro,
The general urges them to go, go, go.

He lines up, his order changes all the time.
The poor soldier has not even earned a dime.
Shots echo in his ear.
Black bullets drawing near.

The wound drips; covered in crimson blood,
The pain feels like a flood.
Sweeping away everything in sight,
All it brings is terrifying fright.

The surgeon takes out his tools,
Why was the soldier such a fool?
To go out and fight,
To use all his might,
For a cause that isn’t just.
Now amputation is a must.

The soldier fantasies about his wife,
Wishing he hadn’t ruined her life.
He writes her a letter, telling her to move on,
Because soon he will be gone, gone, gone.

He lays back and sighs,
Thinking about his comrades that dropped like flies.
On the battlefield, malicious and cruel.
Why were they such fools?

His heart gallops toward it’s last beat,
As he sweats from the horrid heat.
Finally he goes out like a flame,
But there is no one else but him to blame.

The soldier died a crimson death,
As many others did with their last breath.
They all were valiant, brave they still are.
Nothing could be done, this all went to far.

They all died a crimson death,
As many others did with their last breath.
The surgeon sighs and begins to cry,
Over all the men that died a crimson death.




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This article has 6 comments. Post your own!

Katsa08This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Apr. 30, 2012 at 10:59 am:
Very nice! I enjoyed the poem about our brave troops and I know a lot of people will be able to relate to it. I can tell you put your emotions into this. Great job!
 
ShadowRealms replied...
Apr. 30, 2012 at 11:03 am :
Thanks for that:) and I just wrote what I felt they would experiance. I don't really know anyone who has been in the Military or Army.
 
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Ballerinagirl1016This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Apr. 29, 2012 at 6:38 am:

WOOW well for the record i like all Historical fiction!

This reminds me a whole lot of the Red Badge of Courage by Stephen Crane!

great poem

 
ShadowRealms replied...
Apr. 30, 2012 at 10:40 am :
Thanks:D I have never read that poem, I will have to check it out! And this was the first poem I ever wrote, so I didn't know how well I did on it
 
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LiteraryMastermindThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Apr. 22, 2012 at 8:17 pm:
Your poem is good. However, you didn't quite stick to your style. The surgeon phrase has six lines, and the last phrase's last two lines didn't rhyme. Also, the view shifts from the surgeon to soldier without clear distinction between the two. Although the beat isn't steady, that can be attributed to the fact its free verse. All in all, good job!
 
ShadowRealms replied...
Apr. 25, 2012 at 1:42 pm :
Thanks for that, I haven't really written poems, so I'm still a bit new to it! I also thought the defining moment for the surgeon asnd the soldier was when the soldier died, and the last part I added two more verses was also attributed to the free verse:) but thanks for your constructive criticism and I use it for the next time I write poems
 
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