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Self-Pity

I quiver.
I shake.
My vision turns cloudy,
And my skin ice cold.
Tears well up and begin to tip
Down


Down



Down



Until they plummet to stain my shirt.
My eyeliner runs, smudging the back of my hand
as I try to catch those evils
giving my emotions away.
I hate

I hate


I hate.
A not so long ago friend that has chosen to show himself again.
He threatens to ruin…everything.
Make my life harder than it already has proven to be.
I will wallow in self pity some more.
I will allow the tears to fall,
with an ach to, but no idea how to, stop them.
And I will hate.
I will hate passionately.
I will wonder.




Wonder




Wonder.
How and when things got so arduous.
Why the good can’t outweigh the bad,
And why my future doesn’t seem as it should.
So I let the tears swell, I let the hate be my company, and I allow the questions to bury me alive.
But only behind my closed, locked, door.




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