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A Letter to You - A Sestina

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I had always considered myself lucky, having you live so close
to me—just a few houses down. I had never thought
of it as a bad thing. I’m mean, I would never be alone,
and if I was, I could always count on you to stop
by and keep me company. I never imagined our
relationship coming to this. You were my best friend in the world.

Then came the day in 4th grade when you changed my world;
the day you told me you liked me. My joy brought me close
to tears, but I was forced to pretend that our
feelings weren’t mutual because my friends thought
that boys had cooties. Yet, you did not stop
trying to get my attention. In fact, you never left me alone.

You told me if I was your girlfriend, I would never feel alone,
which is what I feared the most, so I let you into my world.
And that’s the problem with ten-year-olds, they don’t stop
to think about the future—how people you once held so close
can one day grow so distant. You taught me that. I had thought
that forever meant everlasting, but it all changed in less than an hour.

I learned something after experiencing those seven years of our
relationship, which is why I’m glad you never left me alone.
You know, it’s funny how our parents had always thought
that we were too young. They lived in a boring world,
but, I learned that they were wrong because when you held me close
I could feel that love was real, and I prayed you would never stop.

But apparently, God didn’t hear my prayers because you did stop
loving me. I had to deal with the reality of knowing that our
love wasn’t like a movie. It wasn’t even close.
Although I grew to depend on you, I’ve learned to walk alone.
I’m still learning and it’s hard, but I have to face the real world.
Being without you is so much harder than I thought.

It’s a boy, you know. I bet you never thought
of having a child at this age, but you can’t stop
it now. He’ll be the most beautiful boy in the world,
with the exception of you. I can’t believe this is really ours
and I wish you were here instead of making me do this alone.
I know you want nothing to do with us, but we will always be close.
You used to be my world, but I gave that a second thought.
I will always hold our baby close and my love for him will never stop.
I just wanted to tell you about our boy. Now, I will finally leave you alone.





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