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She is Not Gone

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Don’t look at me like that,
and judge me, with those awful black beads.
You know nothing of what I feel.
You think it unhealthy;
But there is more here
than what you can decipher.

Don’t tell me that she is gone,
and tell me that I am wrong,
and tell me I’m absurd,
and tell me I’m obsessed.
I won’t listen.
You’ve made your choice and I’ve made mine.

I tell you here and now, I’d give up everything
Just to hear her voice,
To see her vibrant face.
To hold her hands, folded beneath my own,
and feel the warmth of her fingertips.
Just to see those diamond eyes,
Pulse and Blink,
Squint and Widen.

It isn’t fair, that all I will ever know
Is that of imagination
and old photographs.
There is no color, no sound, no life in them.
How I have begged the Great King of Heaven
To send her back to me,
a line I know well I should not have crossed.

I’m so twisted up inside
and yet you still won’t relent.
You mock me
and my plea for absolution.
What sick game is this you play?
Why must you deny what I know to be true?
You think you can trick me into deceiving myself.

Well you listen here, and you listen well.
I have now begun to understand.
You are wrong!

She is not gone.

She is the yellow wind sweeping through my soul.
She is the light my eyes behold.

She is the sweet vibration of my heart string’s resonance.
She is the necessity of my insistence.

She is the shroud of my silhouette across the moon.
She is my radiant pearl among the dunes.

She is the one with the milk-white gleam.
She is the one I will hold in my dreams.

Hark! The black ink bleeds, do not deny me this subtlety.
She’s with me and I with She;
And that’s the way I want it to be.

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This article has 34 comments. Post your own!

vda128 said...
Feb. 24, 2012 at 7:18 pm:
Wow, this is really great. The raw emotion and imagery play very well for the overall appeal. It's obvious there is a lot of personal meaning for you, yet the poem isn't overtaken by it so others can still relate.
NickyJ replied...
Mar. 14, 2012 at 9:28 pm :
Thank You. I'm glad other people might be able to derive their own meaning from it, and apply it to themselves.
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-Ash- said...
Feb. 16, 2012 at 8:36 pm:
amazing! i looovvee it! great descriptions :)
NickyJ replied...
Mar. 14, 2012 at 9:34 pm :
Thank you for the compliments!
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MartyThePartyHost said...
Feb. 16, 2012 at 7:30 pm:
BE-A-U-TIFUL! Dark, gloomy and BEAUTIFUL!
NickyJ replied...
Mar. 14, 2012 at 9:29 pm :
Thanks so much! "Beautiful" is probably the best compliment I could hope for X]
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apensivetapper said...
Feb. 16, 2012 at 6:35 pm:
This is truly amazing, the deep meaning and depth of the soul is present at all times. I love it.
NickyJ replied...
Mar. 14, 2012 at 9:32 pm :
Thanks Tapper! I'm really happy that feeling is evident.
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Studio_Riet said...
Feb. 15, 2012 at 12:06 am:
I think the part about the ink bleeding kinda stands out to me most. I have personal connections to something similar.
NickyJ replied...
Mar. 14, 2012 at 9:33 pm :
That's actually my favorite part of the poem :3
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Blue4indigo said...
Feb. 13, 2012 at 4:07 pm:
This is beautiful, my favorite part was at the end, all the beautiful imagery...overall, awesome job!
NickyJ replied...
Feb. 14, 2012 at 11:05 pm :
Thank you. Ending's my favorite as well. I was just worried it might have come out a little cliche.
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CaliGirl20 said...
Feb. 11, 2012 at 9:25 pm:
love love lovveeee it! its great! really deep meaning :D
NickyJ replied...
Feb. 11, 2012 at 9:28 pm :
Aw thank you. It has a lot of personal importance to me. I'm really happy you like it!
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