Cracks

I struggle;
The dam is cracking.
Droplets seep through,
Despite my intentions.

The pits in my stomach
My brain,
My heart,
Are swelling, crashing waves
Suffocating.
I can't breathe.
I can't escape.
I try to fight, but
I can't.
I, I, I.
I wonder if he hurts too?
If his holes are deep and black, like mine.
I hope so.
I hope not.
He shouldn't hurt.
Or should he?
He left me behind.

The pain of loneliness
Crushes me momentarily,
And the dam crumbles,
Only to be rebuilt
When others are watching.





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This article has 6 comments. Post your own now!

Brisa said...
Apr. 22, 2012 at 6:21 pm
The words definitly pour out in this poem. I could read the emotions in it too.
 
Silver2black said...
Feb. 17, 2012 at 11:26 pm
I think it's a pretty good write, Some parts sound strange like "I, I, I." Doesn't sound like a poem 2 me, It's good 4 a start, The more you read the better you write, Reading your poem out loud could improve your skill, Honestly I really like the first 3 lines and the last 5, Keep Writing :) !
 
Padfoot507 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 17, 2012 at 11:29 pm
i getcha ;) the "I I I" was a way to say i realized how self centered i was being. It's about my brother going to college, so i realized that i was being selfish and he should be a part of it too. Thanks you so much for reading and the advice and such! :D
 
Studio_Riet said...
Feb. 8, 2012 at 5:11 pm
Kind of metaphorical. . . Could be about a lot of different things. . . Nice :)
 
Padfoot507 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 17, 2012 at 11:30 pm
thanks!! means a lot
 
LedZepGurl said...
Feb. 7, 2012 at 11:02 pm
This poem is deep! :o But it's freakin' awesome! xD
 
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