When you first touched my hand I feel like I am everything…… and when I dnt get to see you or hear your voice I feel like I am no longer worthy to anyone. But in the end it works out because its not what you say it what I say and how I feel. And you may make me feel that way but I did depend on you at one point but not now an not ever. Because you told me I was a pos and that what hurt me the most. And now that I can live past it and get over it I still kinda hurt but not much and I have no luggage to Carie now I say yeah I was hurt but hell with it you know yeah we were together for three yrs but now its nothing. Only because I know that I can be hurt again and I dnt want that . because then you think you can control me and I dnt need that controlling problem I have been beat and almost totally gone for life, and yes I have been suicidal but not more for you I am cleaning my hands of you and no more for me. I am tired of the pain you give me daily and the pain I feel daily when I talk to a guy I like its hard to be all no I have never been hurt when the truth is I have been.
its what it feels now!
January 13, 2012