Daddy's Womb | Teen Ink

Daddy's Womb MAG

April 23, 2008
By Anonymous

i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.



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This article has 2181 comments.


BeingAnna GOLD said...
on Sep. 23 2011 at 10:36 pm
BeingAnna GOLD, Montreal, Other
13 articles 0 photos 24 comments

Favorite Quote:
Imperfection is beauty
-Marilyn Monroe

And you are welcome :) You have an amzing talent and I cannot get over how beautiful this is. String emotions must have been felt to write something so powerful. Never stop writting.

BeingAnna GOLD said...
on Sep. 23 2011 at 10:29 pm
BeingAnna GOLD, Montreal, Other
13 articles 0 photos 24 comments

Favorite Quote:
Imperfection is beauty
-Marilyn Monroe

I completely agree! Thanks for understanding.

on Sep. 23 2011 at 7:37 pm
Smiley1068 SILVER, Capitola, California
5 articles 0 photos 29 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't let anyone control you

All I can say is wow!

Old-Ham SILVER said...
on Sep. 23 2011 at 5:56 pm
Old-Ham SILVER, Braidwood, Illinois
6 articles 1 photo 2 comments
so.beautiful.

on Sep. 23 2011 at 5:55 am
thegirlwiththemessyhair, Singapore, Other
0 articles 0 photos 2 comments
i think it means that the dad is too overprotective and while he won't let the son fall, he won't let him fly either.

Mrs.parez said...
on Sep. 22 2011 at 1:15 pm

this is a lovely poem

 


gonzalo said...
on Sep. 16 2011 at 2:33 pm
I liked the poem because it tells us the importance of the fathers to protect us.

TevoRocks said...
on Sep. 14 2011 at 5:44 pm
i really like the story is it true?

on Sep. 14 2011 at 5:43 pm
She_King14 BRONZE, Aurora, Colorado
1 article 0 photos 2 comments
Well, it's not that the dad was mean, the point of the story is that the dad didn't wan;t his kid to leave him.

on Sep. 14 2011 at 12:20 pm
Sow did the kid drown

crazycatlady said...
on Sep. 14 2011 at 9:40 am
The dad sounds really mean. But the whole poem was really good.

smile123 said...
on Sep. 14 2011 at 7:27 am
i loved it i understand what u meant when u said then i knew that i was bound.

on Sep. 13 2011 at 3:51 pm
i love it but how does that make you bound?

on Sep. 12 2011 at 5:45 pm
mariarosamarinelli BRONZE, Henrico, VA, Virginia
1 article 0 photos 5 comments
Ooh, chilling. I loved it.

Brin11 BRONZE said...
on Sep. 12 2011 at 4:07 pm
Brin11 BRONZE, Gilmer, Texas
4 articles 0 photos 18 comments
But scene's also contribute and I can't picture this. He starts out walking toward the water and ends up on stone.....it was just a little confusing while I read it.

on Sep. 11 2011 at 4:02 pm
alohagirl7 GOLD, Klawock, Alaska
14 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"no guy is worth your tears but the one who is wont make u cry"
"your just a guy, nothing more and nothing less"

what was your idea behind this poem? what made you want to write it?

bb42495 BRONZE said...
on Sep. 10 2011 at 10:19 pm
bb42495 BRONZE, New Orleans, Louisiana
1 article 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
\"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could.\" -Ralph Waldo Emerson

i loved the idea behind this poem and the overall rhythm...my only ssuggestion is to change the word birdie, although i know that would present some difficulty for you with reconstruction and rhythm. you did quite well with this piece. i love the idea of a father holding back his own son. you put it into words very well. you have talent.

if you have time check out my poems. i would love your feedback


SHUTTERBUG said...
on Sep. 9 2011 at 9:54 pm
I LUVVED IT IT WAS spectacular and the best part was that he thought he could prove his dad wrong but after a couple times still didnt quit witch i wouldnt have the courage to do any of that

Skillz said...
on Sep. 9 2011 at 12:39 pm
Skillz, Carollton, Texas
0 articles 0 photos 4 comments
This work is really good and i loved how the boy kept proving the father wrong.

on Sep. 7 2011 at 10:45 pm
EmiliePhillippi GOLD, Holland, Michigan
16 articles 0 photos 22 comments

Favorite Quote:
But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.
1 Peter 3:15 

This poem is really amazing! I feel like it is referrring to parents who encourage their children to pursue their dreams, but don't truly let them. This is not necessarily something that can be helped. For example, if a little girl wants to be a fairy when she grows up, her mom's going to have to tell her it's impossible, even though the mother also tells her daughter to make her life whatever she wants it to be.