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Butterflies

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Thoughts flutter about my mind
Like butterflies.
I capture as many as I can
Within the fragile nets that compose my heart,
And my pencil
Translates their colors;
Their patterns;
Their grace;
Onto a piece of notebook paper.
The most beautiful ones
Always get away.



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This article has 17 comments. Post your own!

so_joyThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Dec. 13, 2012 at 3:15 pm:
Wow! I love this! It's incredible! Fantastic job!!! Please read, rate, and comment on my poems! It would mean a lot:) Thanks!
 
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IndiloveThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
May 1, 2012 at 8:01 am:

Proabably not the right word to use but i'm  going to say it anyway:

This poem is so cute! And I love it

haha great job!

 
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Anastasia123 said...
Feb. 2, 2012 at 3:42 pm:
I absolutely adore this poem! I can tell you have a lot of talent! Keep writing!
 
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raindance72This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 26, 2011 at 5:34 pm:
Ahh yes! Writing about writing is a remarkable art isn't it? Usually the only thing I can think of!
 
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raindance72This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 26, 2011 at 5:33 pm:
True; not if they get away though! :) Thanks for your comments, everyone. I love receiving new feedback! :)
 
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JuneTazThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Dec. 26, 2011 at 5:31 pm:
Perfect metaphor- and the last two lines are so true.
 
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TheInnocentOne said...
Dec. 26, 2011 at 5:26 pm:
Interesting metaphor But I think thoughts can be MADE into something beautiful too :)
 
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WhittyKittyThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 18, 2011 at 6:01 pm:
This is beautiful and absolutely amazing! I love it! Would you check out my stuff???
 
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LabradorianThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 7:28 pm:
The figuritive language and double meaning helped to make this poem special but the last line was perfect.
 
raindance72This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 8:03 pm :
Thank you Labradorian! Your comments are so helpful, I really appreciate it.
 
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DreamyJess said...
Dec. 6, 2011 at 5:27 am:
What a pretty poem!
 
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raindance72This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 1, 2011 at 9:49 am:

Thanks to everyone who commented. I really appreciate it.

Would LOVE some more feedback on this poem and my others! :)

 
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brax34This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Nov. 30, 2011 at 3:32 pm:
this is so very good, good job of interpreting your feelings
 
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The_Blackest_RoseThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Nov. 29, 2011 at 10:57 pm:
It seems like today many people use butterflies almost synonymously with bright, happy, and hopeful. I like, though, how you've used them to mean something more down to earth and realistic: Something intriguing, beautiful, but difficult to catch and always just out of reach. It's a short poem, but very effective and packs a lot of wollop for a little package. And how true it is that the best ones always seem to get away. Keep writing! (You're good at it.)
 
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OneofThem said...
Nov. 28, 2011 at 6:56 pm:
Do you know how many poems there are describing the writing process?  Zillions.  Do you know which one I felt was the most true?  This one.  Beautiful.  People often overuse and abuse butterflies in figurative language, but you made them work very well.
 
raindance72This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Nov. 29, 2011 at 9:46 am :
Thank you! :)
 
Illuminatus replied...
Dec. 10, 2011 at 8:07 am :
absoloutly stunning poetry .... i think you picturised the OPPORTUNIST nature of the world today perfectly !!!!!
 
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