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Broken Wings

Today i learned to fly.
Yeah im never coming down.
Ill soar to the heavens through layers of clouds.

Six thousand feet below,
i can see the darkend streets of cities.
Thirty thousand lanterns lit.
But i cant see yours.
No i cant see

Ive flown around the world on broken wings.
Came crashing down on hands and knees.
This represents everything.

You keep digging for answers
but you wont find them in your veins.

I bow my head in silence as the final curtains close.
The lights have gone out. End of the show.

Fragments of you are all that remains.
Bittersweet memories of the lives that we lost,
and the lives weve reclaimed.

I saw something inside you.
You bleed the same as i do.

The clock strikes midnight.
As i count the hours ive been awake.
we crused along at full spead then we hit the brakes.

Ive flown around the world on broken wings.
Came crashing down on hands and knees.
This represents everything.

Its everything.



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This article has 16 comments. Post your own now!

Risible said...
Dec. 1, 2011 at 2:36 pm
This would make a great song! Actually I read your poem Violets are Blue, and that would too! Although it would be pretty dark. I like your intensity and wonderful imagery! I wrote a poem called Here, I Can Barely Think, that you might like. If you get the chance, please check it out and let me know what you think. I really like your writing style. It's very smooth and your rhyming is free of that jerky awkwardness that can make rhyme poetry feel forced. 
 
A_Fate_Unknown replied...
Dec. 1, 2011 at 3:10 pm

yeah these actually are a few songs that i have written. I have yet to record it though.

ill definatly check your work out! thank you for taking the time to give me some feedback.

Yeah, its definatly dark, but i cant help but write whats in me. Yeah i try not to use alot of big words when i rhyme, often simplistic words are the best way to portray things.

 
kwoodman821 replied...
Dec. 1, 2011 at 8:29 pm
I think that poetry comes out better when you are in extreme emotional situations. like Extermely dark or extremely happy. I personally enjoy the "dark" end of the spectrum and i love this! and i like the simplicity of the words. =)  its great all together 
 
kwoodman821 replied...
Dec. 1, 2011 at 8:30 pm
OH and you should try and record them if you can! it does sould like it would come out to be a great song
 
A_Fate_Unknown replied...
Dec. 1, 2011 at 9:01 pm
yeah im working on recording it, got a few tracks i still have to sing over.
 
kwoodman821 replied...
Dec. 1, 2011 at 9:43 pm
Awesome! =D
 
ToranThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Feb. 14, 2012 at 9:03 am
Your'e an amazing song writer
 
A_Fate_Unknown replied...
Feb. 16, 2012 at 10:48 am
Thank you Toran. This piece is probobly the most meaningful to me so I'm glad you like it.
 
ToranThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Feb. 17, 2012 at 8:44 am
I'm glad it means so much to you. I hate when people write just to write. It seems that yours really comes from the heart
 
A_Fate_Unknown replied...
Feb. 17, 2012 at 10:22 pm
yeah this was just about someone i used to be close to who killed herself about six years ago.
 
ToranThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Feb. 20, 2012 at 5:41 pm
Whoa. That's really sad, especially for a song so beautiful. I'm really glad you write what you feel, it means a lot to a lot of other people.
 
SuNshiNe007 replied...
Feb. 21, 2012 at 7:50 am
Toran is right A_Fate_Unknown..it does mean alot to alot of other people
 
ToranThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Feb. 22, 2012 at 8:55 am
We should stop, I think he's blushing :) Anyway, keep up the great work!
 
A_Fate_Unknown replied...
Feb. 24, 2012 at 8:53 pm
haha well thank you guys. Glad I can reach someone. 
 
SuNshiNe007 replied...
Mar. 1, 2012 at 9:22 am
Your welcome:) haha..
 
Theartist22B replied...
Apr. 1 at 4:09 pm
I can't even put into words what this article makes me feel, all it can say is it really touched me.
 
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