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Masks

How long I’ve waited
To be held by you
The darkness enveloped
Too thick to see
Has taught to numb
To live without the pain
The happy faces dance by
Are not of mine but another one
One no one can see
Yet I see her standing there
As plain as can be
Reflecting out a nice big smile
Back at me, tears and blood
Tears that fall for you
Blood that belongs to you
The heart that aches to be away
Has always been for you
Your smell, your touch, your speech
Can neither harm nor heal
Rectify or justify
But to say you care
Rips the burning hole asunder
Who can tell when greeted with silence
That silence hurts with its own pain
Incomparable to the rest
And yet the love I feel for you
Is felt all around the pain
Above, below, around and round
More vast than the vastest expanse
The fear that taints the edges
Ties me to the world
The world that needs to f*** itself
And leave me here to die
To wallow in the blood and tears
The tears that are yours
The blood that is yours
The fear that is yours
The fear that you’ll leave
And leave for good
To miss you is so hard
When I see you every day
Trying not to cry
To be strong for others
When I’m crumbling inside
Makes me want to stay in bed
And let the world forget me
I’ll try to win over the feeling
Of intense helplessness
But I cannot hide the pain
Of missing you
I’ll always miss you
Always love you
And hope the hurt will go away
But that you never will
And though the world may forget me
I know you never will.



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