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Goodbye for now.

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When I saw you
Come and sit next to me,
With your eyes so blue,
I felt like I could hardly breath.

You said "would you like to
come on a walk with me?"
I said yes, then you
took me to see
Your favorite place
then you handed me a mirror
to see the smile on my face
As you drew nearer.

Then you took my hand
and said "hey, do you believe in
destiny,
'Cause I believe
that you were meant for me."

Then I was delighted to see
You get down on one knee
And take out a ring
And say "Will you marry me?"

I hardly muffled a yes
'Cause I was hugging your neck.
It felt like all day
That we remained that way.

So as I stand here,
Looking down at your pale, lifeless face,
I let my tears fall on your chest,as I chase
That memory
Of you and me.

The good times we had
and the things we got to do.
The giggles and laughs
The jokes you told me, and I told you.

But now that is done
Because you are gone.
But still forever
our love will carry on.

And even though the light
is gone from your eyes,
I embrace you,
to say goodbye.
And it's almost as if I can hear you
telling me it's gonna be alright.
'Cause I will see you
In another life.



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This article has 30 comments. Post your own!

LexusMarieThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
today at 8:15 pm:
Hey there! You are a very talented writer as it so clearly shows here in this poem and all of your other work. The fact that you are so talented and smart to know that you needed/wanted a lot of emotion in here and it had to be a poem and not a song to do that is very impressive. It's great to know that writer's can change their minds in order to make their work even better. The title lets the reader know that this will be a sad, but they want to read it.. the title is a bit mysterious! ... (more »)
 
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LilZo11This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
May 4, 2012 at 9:23 am:
i thought this was going to be a happy love poem until i got halfway through, and i see the word "lifeless" and my breath caught in my throat and i began reading feverishly, tears were in my eyes, it was so sad, yet beautifully crafted, where did you get the idea for it?
 
Kev-GirlThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
May 8, 2012 at 12:55 pm :

Aww, thank you so much! You have no idea how much it really means to me to have people give such posotive feedback on my works, so thank you. 

 

And when I wrote this, I wrote it because I just wanted to try something new. It hadn't had any really personal meaning behind it, but not long after I wrote, something came up in my life, and this has a lot more of a personal story behind it then it did when I first wrote it. I mostly think of my really close friend who lost ... (more »)

 
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Ebony_Rose said...
Dec. 16, 2011 at 10:46 am:
Good Job :) try not to use thee word "said" as much though...
 
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J4Yc3 said...
Oct. 26, 2011 at 8:36 pm:
One of my favorites. Loved it a lot it really kept my attention GREAT work!
 
kingofwritersThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Nov. 24, 2011 at 9:58 am :
Wow, this is a really good poem! Keep up the good work!
 
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JamesODalaigh This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Oct. 23, 2011 at 8:44 am:
Really powerful stuff, full of raw emotion. Great job.
 
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RayBaytheDinosaurThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Oct. 17, 2011 at 2:57 pm:
Wow mood change much? It was all happy and romantic and then bam made me wanna cry. Really powerful though, and really good =)
 
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AngelsLullaby said...
Oct. 12, 2011 at 10:06 pm:
Really great poem. It's very meaningful and its obvious you put alot of effort into making this perfect.
 
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JoanMole This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Oct. 12, 2011 at 2:26 am:
I think this is a great poem and I love the way it tells a story. If I had to give you some constructive criticsm it would be to maybe have more regular stanzas and a steady rhythym. However, your poem is lovely as is :)
 
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Shortiee said...
Oct. 9, 2011 at 7:50 pm:
This have so many different emotions in one. I really loved this. You went back to memories and then you snapped back to reality. This was amazing 5/5 for sure :)
 
Kev-GirlThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Oct. 9, 2011 at 8:02 pm :
:D Thank you.
 
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leafyThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Oct. 9, 2011 at 12:41 pm:
Wow kev-girl, this is really nice! That's annoying though how the quote marks messed it up...but like other than that, your poem was awesome and meaningful 5/5
 
Kev-GirlThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Oct. 9, 2011 at 12:50 pm :
Thank you very much! :)
 
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Cody_Goelz said...
Oct. 7, 2011 at 8:20 pm:
this is really good you should write more stuff im anxious to see more this is flawless
 
Kev-GirlThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Oct. 8, 2011 at 9:01 am :
Wow, thanks cody_Goelz! I'm actually still pretty new to writing poety, and this is only my,like, 4th poem I've ever written! So it means alot to know that it's good! :)
 
Cody_Goelz replied...
Oct. 8, 2011 at 9:44 am :
ive filled two composition books on my third and i think it is good. do you relate your poetry to your life?
 
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Taylor D. said...
Oct. 6, 2011 at 7:56 pm:
Wow, i'm literally almost crying. This really meant a lot to me, my boyfriend of 2 years, died a few months ago and this really hit the spot! You're so talented! Good Job!
 
Kev-GirlThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Oct. 7, 2011 at 7:53 am :
Wow, I'm so sorry your boyfriend died. :( But I'm glad you could kinda relate to the poem! Thanks for the comment!
 
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leah_beeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Oct. 6, 2011 at 5:02 pm:
Wow! This was really amazing; it was sad but the way you wrote it gave the reader hope. The only thing is the way the first stanzas start with "then" if you cut that out it would make them stronger. Also don't put that quote thing it ruins the flow. Overall amazing!!!
 
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