Impressive

I find it interesting of how many personalities
just one person could have.
It impresses me how innocent you act
I'm amazed by how close you are,
yet I feel so alone.
This relation used to shine so bright
but I just watched it all fade.
I think
one thing
and see another.
The pretending has to stop
I can't even tell the real you
My mind keeps thinking,
today's the last day,
it's over.
But my heart tries to overpower the screaming voice
of my mind
but all my heart can do is whisper,
there's still hope.
Your crying over nothing.
I can't believe without thinking.
I can't say I love you without lying.
I can't pretend everything's okay
The guilt weighs me down more then anything.
Nothing can go right,
not when I worry every second of losing you.
We've dated so many times, what if this is the final?
But there has to be a reason why we keep going back to each other.
I want to say I'm done
But I can't let go.
Right now,
I wish you could open your eyes and realize
exactly what's wrong,
without me having to say a word.
If I tell you what's been on my mind,
my mind would win.
We'd be over.
I've been so lost lately
just helplessly crying.
Keeping my feelings far away from speaking them.
The thinking just keeps building up,
and I'm just waiting for everything to crumple atop of me.
If I could ask you one thing right now,
I would ask if you believed me,
When I say I'm okay.





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