Do you remember your first jealousy, of the cast and attention the boy with the broken arm received, and trying to break your own arm so you could be the center of attention?
Do you remember when you first realized that attention didn’t necessarily mean happiness?
Do you remember your first day of school, nervously shaking as you approached the gaggle of pig-tailed girls playing in the corner- “Can I play with you?”
Do you remember when you first realized that the only way you could succeed was with a dollop of chutzpah?
Do you remember your first dance, with a boy with bouncy curls and a missing tooth at a family wedding, watching the poofy skirt that smelled of lavender as it swirled around your ankles, both of you uncomfortable and embarrassed as people exclaimed, “How cute!” and wondering what exactly was cute about it?
Do you remember when you first realized that there were more emotions than you could understand?
Do you remember the difficulty of fastening the clasp on your favorite red sparkly shoes, and how, no matter how hard you struggled, your chubby fingers couldn’t close on the clip?
Do you remember the first time you were able to do it yourself?
Do you remember your first rejection, the birthday party your whole class was invited to- except for you?
Do you remember when you first realized why?