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The Bleak Land

March 3, 2011
By Aderes47 GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
More by this author
Aderes47 GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 897 comments

Favorite Quote:
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.
Henry Drummond

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One day,
I was traveling
And I found a land that looked so warm
So warm!
I didn’t think I’d need a coat
So I went in
Without much to protect me

After I stayed awhile,
The land became cold
Oh so cold!

Water became ice
Snow covered the land
What was once a tropical paradise
Became a bleak land

Everyone else is warm
They have a coat
Or a mug
Or a fire
Or a friend to keep warm with

But since I am only a stranger
I have no one

I walk from place to place
Trying to get warm
But it only gets colder and colder
Darker and darker

And the hole I dug myself in
Only gets deeper and deeper

© Lauren M., Scotch Plains, NJ

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 18 comments.

Aderes47 GOLD said...
on Aug. 20 2011 at 5:35 pm
Aderes47 GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 897 comments

Favorite Quote:
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.
Henry Drummond

View profile

Thank you! I'll be sure to check out more of your work....

:)

Destinee BRONZE said...
on Aug. 15 2011 at 8:51 pm
Destinee BRONZE, Oakville, Other
3 articles 0 photos 303 comments

Favorite Quote:
Blegh. - Abraham Lincoln

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I actually really like this! You're a great poety. :) And I agree with Thesilentraven, it reminds me of The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. 

Anyway, great poem!
Aderes47 GOLD said...
on Aug. 9 2011 at 6:10 pm
Aderes47 GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 897 comments

Favorite Quote:
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.
Henry Drummond

View profile

Iamtheshystargirl said that too! And I agree. (although I did not realize that until after she said it) 

We actually discussed more about it, you can comment on what we said. :)

Thesilentraven PLATINUM said...
on Aug. 9 2011 at 5:54 pm
Thesilentraven PLATINUM, Mableton, Georgia
40 articles 2 photos 1632 comments

Favorite Quote:
"il piu nell' uno," (according to Emerson, an Italian expression for beauty)

"Unable are the loved to die, for love is immortality" ~Emily Dickinson

"The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain"
~Kahlil Gibran

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I really like this, though it did create a bleak image (which was purposeful, so you did well!). Really captures the feeling of being a stranger in a strange land. It really reminded me of the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, before it became warm again...
Aderes47 GOLD said...
on Aug. 9 2011 at 8:56 am
Aderes47 GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 897 comments

Favorite Quote:
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.
Henry Drummond

View profile

Yeah, this is actually a metaphoric poem(it represents something else entirely to me). My poem is one of those poems that is open to your own interpretation and I welcome different and alternative interpretations of this poem. 

As for the french, Merci! 

savetheplanet PLATINUM said...
on Aug. 8 2011 at 11:44 pm
savetheplanet PLATINUM, Anaheim, California
45 articles 9 photos 564 comments

Favorite Quote:
It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

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I really like how this poem could be applied to many situations.  And in honor of Boosflash's French, Je pense ton poème est très beau.
Aderes47 GOLD said...
on Aug. 3 2011 at 2:04 pm
Aderes47 GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 897 comments

Favorite Quote:
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.
Henry Drummond

View profile
Thank you! That really made my day! :)
Boosflash DIAMOND said...
on Aug. 2 2011 at 10:21 pm
Boosflash DIAMOND, Papillion, Nebraska
55 articles 0 photos 2066 comments

Favorite Quote:
What the front door.

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...=Evil laugh+very well+you are agood writer.
Aderes47 GOLD said...
on Aug. 1 2011 at 5:05 pm
Aderes47 GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 897 comments

Favorite Quote:
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.
Henry Drummond

View profile
Cool! Let me go there right now...
IamtheshyStargirl PLATINUM said...
on Aug. 1 2011 at 4:09 pm
IamtheshyStargirl PLATINUM, Lothlorien, Utah
44 articles 16 photos 2206 comments

Favorite Quote:
Boredom instigates extreme creativity.
~Amoniel

"Bowing gratefully to all of my subjects, 'thank you. Thank you. The pleasure is mine." Nah, I'm just kidding. We're all kings together.'"
~Thesilentraven

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Hey Aderes, would you by any chance like to join a teenink bookclub? I started one in the book of the month forum, the title of the thread is 'book club'. We're meeting right now, if you want to join us. (Actually, there's no body there but me at the moment, everyone else is in Canada, or on holiday.)
Aderes47 GOLD said...
on Aug. 1 2011 at 3:25 pm
Aderes47 GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 897 comments

Favorite Quote:
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.
Henry Drummond

View profile

I agree. This poem reminds even me of Narnia. It has that Narnia effect, especially the picture. The picture reminds me of the forest.  

Do you like the Narnia movies? The newest ones? 

Aderes47 GOLD said...
on Aug. 1 2011 at 3:11 pm
Aderes47 GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 897 comments

Favorite Quote:
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.
Henry Drummond

View profile

Merci Beaucoup! :)

But I don't understand everything that you said. Just translate the last sentence that you said in French.

Boosflash DIAMOND said...
on Jul. 31 2011 at 11:50 pm
Boosflash DIAMOND, Papillion, Nebraska
55 articles 0 photos 2066 comments

Favorite Quote:
What the front door.

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mu...mu...MUHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! tres bien mon captain. tu es ecrivain tres bon! i love the ending.
IamtheshyStargirl PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 14 2011 at 11:35 am
IamtheshyStargirl PLATINUM, Lothlorien, Utah
44 articles 16 photos 2206 comments

Favorite Quote:
Boredom instigates extreme creativity.
~Amoniel

"Bowing gratefully to all of my subjects, 'thank you. Thank you. The pleasure is mine." Nah, I'm just kidding. We're all kings together.'"
~Thesilentraven

View profile
This reminds me of Narnia, in the time of the white witch. Kind of how the narnians probably wouldn't trust anyone new very much.
Aderes47 GOLD said...
on May. 30 2011 at 3:10 pm
Aderes47 GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 897 comments

Favorite Quote:
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.
Henry Drummond

View profile
Thank you! :) 
krarthurs SILVER said...
on May. 30 2011 at 12:55 pm
krarthurs SILVER, Plymouth, Massachusetts
9 articles 3 photos 87 comments

Favorite Quote:
All generous minds have a horror of what are commonly called "Facts". They are the brute beasts of the intellectual domain.
-Thomas Hobbes

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This is a very powerful piece, and it can be interepreted in different ways. Good job, keep it up!
Aderes47 GOLD said...
on May. 30 2011 at 5:15 am
Aderes47 GOLD, Cambridge, Massachusetts
11 articles 0 photos 897 comments

Favorite Quote:
You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments when you have truly lived are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.
Henry Drummond

View profile

Thank you!! :)

Me too! 

Writomania PLATINUM said...
on May. 30 2011 at 12:00 am
Writomania PLATINUM, New Delhi, Other
22 articles 0 photos 119 comments

Favorite Quote:
"What really does not kill you, will only make you stronger"- Kanye West
"If there was no electricity, we would've had to watch the television by candle light"- Joe Jonas
Nobody will ever win the Battle of the Sexes. There's just too much fraternizing with the enemy. ~Henry Kissinger

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one word to describe this.

Wow.

Well written. Know whats the best thing about your writing? You express the best in juts a few words.. im surprised why TeenInk didn't choose your work for publishing :/