Wars with Words

September 7, 2010
I remember the fights,
All of them leading to screaming
Some were worse than others,
But they were always bad
The ones I hated the most,
They should have been small
But they exploded
They were like grenades
Something so small
could do so much damage
One fight I remember most,
Was simply cleaning the house
See he and I were doing everything
He was just sitting on the couch
unlike me, he could fight back
He told us to do the dishes again
She had previous plans that night
She didn't want to become late
HE told her that she was part of the family
she had to help before she left
I thought that he should help too
I mean he's part of the family, right?
She spoke my thoughts
Immediately he got red in the face and started
He started screamin' and went ranting on
She didn't give up
The more he added for us to do she got worse
Now we had to wash the windows
More screaming back and forth
Now all the floors were added
I held back the tears
As the screaming got louder
His lasts words were everything better get done
Then he walked out
As soon as the door shut,
the tears rushed down my face
Taylor hugged me and began to cry
She told me it would be okay
He would forget it
I stopped crying and started to clean
She told me to just help her with the dishes
and that he could hire someone to clean the windows
And someone who will clean the floors
When she left I crawled in bed
I saw his face when i closed my eyes
How could he be so mad at us?
It was only a simple question
His eyes glowed with anger
I swear he could've hit her
That's what i was afraid of
All these years and he's never hit us,
Except for spankings and games
But she thinks that he abused us
With his outbursts of hatred
His words gave sharp pains
she was right about him
He came home like nothing happened
I doubt he even remembers that day
It was long ago,
But i remember clearly
I thought tonight he would break
He came so close to hitting her
twenty minutes late he apologized to us
He asked me if he scared me
I told him I don't know
But I did know, I was terrified
We all came out of hiding for dinner
Acting as if nothing happened
I'll always remember these nights
Hearing her screams
and her cries that come after
at least now he realizes,
that he overreacted
Is it bad that I don't think it's okay?
It's not okay to forget that soon
To accept the apology yet
Cause when will it stop?
Next year? Five years?
Will it take my suicide for him to learn?
when he'll learn that he hurt us
We suffered with these fights
The ones I'll always remember
Or will he learn after he breaks
When he sees our horrified faces
The red mark that slowly bruises
Like the spankings we used to get
I learned tonight that I'll always be afraid





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