I Miss You More

July 9, 2010
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Because I never understood
How you made me feel,
I blamed it all on you.
I grew cold and hard and ruthless.
And it became a way of life.
The aching nabs me every now and then
But I haven’t felt remorse.
All the twisting, all the turning
Spun me upside down.
You weren’t as nice to look at
From that angle.
So I pushed you out of sight.
But as I hang here upside down,
I find I miss you more
Than I ever though I would.
Like you had crossed the great blue sea
And haven’t yet come home.
This isn’t who I thought I’d be,
Never, not even at the end.
I thought I’d come out differently,
More sharp, more fine, more elegant.
But elegance isn’t easy.
When I'm missing you its worse,
And I hold my image close,
I cherish the back of your head
As you walked away with faithful steps
Far away to nowhere, I was sure,
That I might want to follow.
But now I wonder as I sit here
That maybe after all, I could be wrong,
And you wanted me to follow.
And so I miss you more
When I'm sitting upside down.

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