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Subtle Sweethearts

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wisps of cotton candy
sugar already sweet lips.
summer slicked swimsuits
to innocence and
slightly salted skin from
oceanic frolicking.
granulated memories of
warm hearts and
sweeping soles
shift as new lovers
wander along in
soaring sunsets
clasp handfuls of time
and reminiscent particles
of the day.





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This article has 5 comments. Post your own now!

chrisbriones said...
Aug. 25, 2010 at 12:48 am
As if your poetic hand was guiding me all the while.
 
kiwi12 said...
Aug. 22, 2010 at 7:40 pm
I can taste this poem. I love it. I feel like I'm there, part of it...  really good job!
 
DiamondsIntheGrass This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 19, 2010 at 8:38 am
you dont sound depressed :) it sounds very sweet.
 
ayaman said...
Aug. 14, 2010 at 11:34 pm
It's good, but I feel like its a bit forced. Maybe if you tried it in a different tense itd flow better, or if you played with the word choice a bit more that could work too.
 
Marlyre This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 15, 2010 at 9:22 pm
thanks! will try that!
 
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