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This? - This is Nothing At All

For the first time in a long time,
The pain escapes through the corners of my eyes.
A switch is flipped; my body trembles; images blur,
And the intensity of the pain demolishes my control.

I don't want an "It'll be okay",
Save your sympathy for someone else.
No forced, fake "I understand"s,
Or someone to hold me together.
I want to revel in this deep abyss of hurt -
More real than any spoken word.

I wallow in the relentless, unmerciful sting
Invading every nerve ending in my body-
Indulge in the electrocution of my emotions.
I urge the agony to never end;
Wish the feeling was a chemical
I could inject into my veins at my discretion.

I beg it to take over my soul for the time being.
To make up for the times I feel nothing at all.



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This article has 17 comments. Post your own now!

Hazel-daisy This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 25, 2011 at 7:49 pm
i see the resemblence to my poem 'I know you saw' which you commented on, but yeah i agree a little darker! once again, i can realte...a lot, i think its really great, and really well written too, good job! :)
 
GangstaEyes This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jul. 25, 2011 at 8:31 pm
Thanks a milli! Yeah, I'm not really good at finding a balance. My stuff is usually either really dark or really happy :P
 
Katherine1 said...
Aug. 19, 2010 at 2:15 pm
this is a very cool poem, it made me think and i enjoyed reading it. Keep it up!
 
GangstaEyes This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 19, 2010 at 5:13 pm
Thanks so much! I'm glad it got your gears spinning! :)
 
DiamondsIntheGrass This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 11, 2010 at 7:30 pm
sometimes it jsut feels better to wallow around in a pool of hurt.  makes you feel better latter, for some odd reason of another.
 
GangstaEyes This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 13, 2010 at 10:01 am
Agreed :)     
 
Crystal_Colossae said...
Aug. 11, 2010 at 5:14 pm
Wow, great emotion.  You have a very real way of expressing things.
 
GangstaEyes This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 13, 2010 at 10:01 am
Thank you so much :)
 
Rain777 said...
Jul. 11, 2010 at 2:07 pm
This is AMAZING;
 
GangstaEyes This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jul. 22, 2010 at 8:33 am
Thanks again for all the comments!
 
olican16 said...
Jul. 9, 2010 at 12:53 pm
after reading this a coupel of times like ellyn bo bellyn said  it leaves me speachless!! i love all of your stuff... keep writing!!
 
ellyn-bo-bellyn_2014 said...
Jul. 1, 2010 at 5:50 pm
Ok. seriously, there aren't words to describe the feeling reading this poem gave me. It was like someone punched me in the stomach and stole my voicebox at the same time. You read this to me one time before. It's beautiful in its pain. You're a writer, Lovey, get it through your brain. Love everything by you!
 
GangstaEyes This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 1, 2010 at 8:52 am
Thanks for all the comments guys! I appreciate everything y'all have to say!
 
malgal3 said...
Jun. 23, 2010 at 6:29 pm
I like the truth behind this poem. The not wanting that false sense of security that people try to thrust upon you. Awesome job, GangstaEyes
 
Forgotten said...
Jun. 23, 2010 at 4:55 pm
i really like how well you described everything in this poem. and my favorite part of it all would have to be the second stanza. i felt i could relate to that. :) keep writing because this was very good.
 
olican said...
Jun. 5, 2010 at 5:29 pm

wow o wow this is soooooooooooo good lov ya al

 

 
irrara12 said...
Jun. 4, 2010 at 5:59 pm
great poem
 
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