I Hate to Watch

I hate to see
your messy apartment
papers on the table
dirty dishes in the sink

I hate to hear
Dad telling you
again
to take your pills
knowing
you will forget

I hate to taste
food from you
green beans
used to be
the best
flatbread
tasted so good
now burnt, tasteless

I hate to smell
the hospital ward
the disinfectant
the air of people
who won’t fully
recover
from their stroke

I hate to watch
as you
slowly
slip
farther
away

I hate to know
I can’t
do
anything
to bring you back.