My, Dear. My, Darling.

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My darling we are young and so is this night.
Lets sit on the bank of a nameless creek
And speak without words just lips and eyes
Hold my hand and stare at the lines in my skin
And I'll stare at the care in your honey comb eyes
In the star light every single thing looks
Every single shade of right and sweet and
And what ever makes you seem to breath through
Your eyes and drink through your smells.
Sit next to me in a golden infant infantry
Of old grass giving you a smile bath.
You sit next you me with tapering cheeks
Tapering to an open jaw. Would you love me
Dear when I'm old and thin or fat,
When the stars fall from the never ending
Sky burning holes in countless, careless
Faces? We grow old with the night.
And you wake with a varnish of spring dew
On and in your eyes. On and in your mouth.
Who will we turn out to be when our hair once
There is in the care of our combs, clothes and shower drains,
When our friend have evaporated and our sight is blurred?
To tell you the truth I think we'll be the same
As when we learned to walk, as when we learned to talk
Perfectly the same as when our mothers' waist first widened





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LaurenButler15 said...
Sept. 3, 2010 at 11:56 am
Truly amazing! Your wrong I didn't like it..... I loved it :] and thanks for the feedback on mine! Keep up the amazing work!
 
timevampire This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Nov. 4, 2010 at 3:53 pm
Thankss. :)
 
DreamWriter15 said...
Jun. 18, 2010 at 11:29 pm
I can imagine this being a mother's lullaby or a lover's wish at night.  It's beautiful, and soft and tender, like a baby's first swaddling blanket.  I love it.
 
timevampire This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jun. 19, 2010 at 11:35 am

 Thank you DreamWriter.

This poem is me talking to myself at 3 a.m. about a girl I wanted to grow old with. I wanted it to sind with out music maybe it worked?

 
DreamWriter15 replied...
Jun. 19, 2010 at 1:28 pm
Yeah, it worked...though I don't see it as much a love song as a lullaby...maybe it was just the last part....but either way, it's beautiful!
 
timevampire This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jun. 22, 2010 at 1:06 pm
Oh yeah I see what you mean.
 
DreamWriter15 replied...
Jun. 25, 2010 at 3:55 pm
but it's still very good!
 
Ammaz said...
May 25, 2010 at 11:11 am

Its kinda repetive, but this is a good poem, I like it. You're really good at painting pictures in the readers head.

keep it up!

 
timevampire This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
May 27, 2010 at 6:23 pm
What do you mean "repetive" ?
 
Ammaz replied...
Jun. 1, 2010 at 9:08 am
hummm, sry "repetive" has sort of a negative connotation. I just mean that it convays the same idea in a couple of different ways. It works though, I didnt mean nething bad by it, this is a good poem.
 
timevampire This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jun. 18, 2010 at 4:32 pm
O, I didn't think you ment bad. I just was wondering. I mean I like it what else could I want.
 
Evedon said...
May 21, 2010 at 10:49 pm
wonderful poem. It's really romantic, and has great imagery and detail. I really like your poems :)
 
mysterywriter2012 said...
May 11, 2010 at 7:22 pm
hey comment for comment. plzz read my stuff and let me know what you think. Great poem by the way!! :D
 
Methods-of-my-Life replied...
May 12, 2010 at 11:55 pm
I absolutly loved this poem great job =) I have more on the way and am writing more if you want to read them +)
 
Egyptiangirl13 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 10, 2010 at 7:42 pm
Yah, same here i really liked it-great imagery!!!
 
BoosflashThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 10, 2010 at 3:54 pm
this is really nice. once I read it over about five more times-give or take- it will become one of my THREE favorites on teeink. just goes to show how you can love somebodys writing without having the slightest idea what they're talking about.
 
timevampire This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
May 10, 2010 at 6:10 pm

Thanks that's really awesome of you! 

Yeah, this is all about the feeling...like...music you know what I mean? The words set the mood The sound. The flow.

 
BoosflashThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
May 10, 2010 at 6:20 pm
yeah- I listen to music and I hit my head on the wall multiple times, all part of "the feeling"-really hard. and no-I dont know what you mean. Imma read it again, and again...
 
timevampire This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
May 11, 2010 at 12:51 pm
Hardcore music I see. and about the poem: just let it soak in :P You know like the blood that's your wall now.
 
BoosflashThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
May 11, 2010 at 4:16 pm
its more like maybe seether and shinedown but with some added chemical impulses-I'm working on your poem captain.
 
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