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Scizophrenia

Streetlamps dump light
And pave
The way
Down the street;
It’s just one more
Dead end and I’ll
Have to turn back
<i>Back. Black. Pack. Jack.
Jack in the box.
POP.
I am a weasel.
I am evil. </i>
To the dreaded
Place where
I can hear
The footsteps
Of the lost and lonely.

Please, mister, tell me
Where I can find
A rabbit hole,
Or a looking glass,
Or a crawlspace,
<i>Safe place.
Haven. Heaven.
I used to be God.</i>
Because they have
Painted my eyes blind
To the escapes
And the demons,
I could see before.

Oh, please do not
Take me back;
They will nail
My feet
To the ground
So I won’t run away
From their
Beds with leather straps,
Or their
Electrical wires.
<i>Wires. Fires. Tire. Liar.</i>
Again.

I wish I could
Warn you,
But they stapled
My paper lips shut
With quality time
On my lonesome,
<i>Alone.
Alone is when
The demons come.</i>
Which erased what
Had been written,
So that I
Could not find
The words
To challenge.

Please, mister, point me
To the exit
Because it’s neon glow
Was tempered to me
By the pills that
They forced,
And the liquid
Which clouded
My mind.
<i>Because beings
Use my mind.
I am an instrument.
Did you know I am evil?
I have killed
Many people
With my thoughts.</i>

And gravity
Abandoned me,
<i>Because I am evil,</i>
And the walls
Look like the ceiling,
And the ceiling looks like
The walls.
<i>And they breathe
And tell me
Of the wars</i>

My credits played,
But there was no
Happy ending,
<i>Because there is
No happiness for
Bad people.
I am a
Bad girl.
Girls. Pearls. Earls.
I am a queen.</i>
Or lesson learned.
I take that back;
One lesson was learned
Through the struggle:
Not to question.

Please, mister, help me,
Please do not
Walk away
From the iron bars;
<i>I am a murderer.</i>
I don’t know you,
But I need you.
Please, please…
<i>Peas. Green. Queen.
I used to be God,
Did you know?
I used to be God,
But then I got
Demoted.</i>

I sob quietly
As your footsteps
Fade away from
My locked door,
Because you
Can see the exit.
Because they have
Not painted your eyes
With foggy liquid,
Or nailed your feet
With leather straps,
Or stapled your lips
With solitude.

Yet.
<i>Bet. Wet. Jet.
I am evil
I have
Murdered many
With my thoughts.</i>




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