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Denies of a Hopeful Heart

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There he goes down the hall.
He didn't look.
He doesn't care.
He doesn't care that he's the cause of my tears each night.
He doesn't know.

"How do i feel?" I ask myself.
I can't even answer myself.
Idon't know.
All I know is that I'm mad at him.
A firey red anger such as the mop-top that covers his head from being bare.

He's my friend.
I like that.
But I don't like what it comes with.
All of his friends coming up to me, "You like him!","You like him!".
I just want to cry.
Die.

They want us together.
Most everyone wants us together.
Everyone exept each other.
Maybe.

It all started that September day in science.
I picked my number out of the bucket & found my partner.
"Oh great. This losser." I thought.

"Who'd you get?" his best friend asks.
He points to his left & there i stand.
I felt like a last-place trophy on display.
"Hey,"
The best friend says with a smirk.
"You two would make a cute couple!"
He laughed though he wasn't kidding.
"Oh my God! No we would n't!"
I immediatly defended my self.
He put on his dopey stare.
His adorable, dumb stare.
His best friend pulled over my best friend.
"Don't you think they would look good together?" He asked her.
She look at us for a second.
Staring at us with her judgmental, brown eyes.
"Yeah." And my smile disappeared.
"Yeah they are cute together."

Then there is topics.
Every six days together in a class with nine other students from our team.
Most days he'll sit with me.
It makes me happy.
Other days he sits with his best friend.
The one that wants use together.
The one that thinks I like his best friend.

Then there was art.
She just had to put us next to each other.
We talked.
I did half of his project.

I asked him who he liked.

Not me.

Do i really wish it was?
How stupid can I be?
How far will my imagination stretch?
How hopeful is the heart?

"You like him." They say.
"Everyone knows you do."
Even him.
Do I tell lies when I deny?
Each just gets me farther & farther away from him.
Whether it's the direction I want to be going in, I don't know.





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purple_ashes said...
Apr. 4, 2010 at 4:38 pm
I love this! the thing is i do relate to this almost exactly. I like this guy and everyone know and says, 'you should go out' but he would never like me. I ask myself what I find so special in him everynight but then the next day in school the question is answered. I'm really sorry about this but i really loved this!!!!! Gerat job. You give the reader your point of veiw and that is the most relatable thing! great work!
 
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