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Still

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I sit here alone
silent as gold
with more words in my head
than words i say
I always thought it'd be someday
just not this day
i always meant to say "hi"
but i always just walked by
you always meant to love me
i didnt mean to hurt
but you just smile and say
"its all in the past"
But the past is the last
of everything we did
and it wasnt a good place
to leave off on
because today im on
and tomorrow im off
its a constant plunge downward
and you never even heard
about it
im glad no one told you
you would have broke down with tears
and id hate to look at you
to tell you the reason why
why i did it
why i tried
and id have to see you cry
im glad you didnt hear
it'd be one less thing for you to fear
and a breath to save
from telling you not to worry
although i know you would
and you still do
but you care more than anything else
i dont understand why
as your emotions begin to melt
you still focus on me
you still love me
after everything ive done
after every song we sung
and now neglect to hear
after it all
but as my eyes scrolled through those words again
everything was clear
and im sorry for what happened
and i know that it saddened
you in ways too hard to express
you'll never tell me so
but ill always know
you loved me
and im sorry



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