Floccinaucinihilipilification (Look it up) MAG

May 20, 2009
By DinosoarJen DIAMOND, Scottsville, New York
DinosoarJen DIAMOND, Scottsville, New York
86 articles 0 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
Just another casualty.
It's sad but true.
And even dead I'm still ahead
of most of you.


Your smile is an explosion in me.
You hear the clicking of the keyboard
and it is every single one of my heartbeats.
Who's to know that you make me so happy?

Your oblivious disposition is a murder in me.
You back out of my driveway
and wonder if the tires leave a mark.
They always leave a mark.
Who's to know that thinking of you makes me cry?

Your face makes me feel things
that I didn't even know I could feel.
Intense depression,
concentration,
overwhelming anxiety,
and happiness like there's a carnival in my heart.
Who's to know.

I write down these words
and they have no meaning.
I've been here for hours
staring at my pen
because all my precious words are missing.
The words I have are:
useless,
depressing,
ungrateful,
and messy.
This is all your fault,
Miss Breathtaking Gorgeous.
With each of your breaths
you insensitively
plow me into the ground.
And I am helpless.



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This article has 11 comments.


Suhaima said...
on Dec. 28 2012 at 9:50 pm
Suhaima, Lol, Other
0 articles 0 photos 13 comments
Your face makes me feel things that I didn't even know I could feel. Intense depression, concentration, overwhelming anxiety, and happiness like there's a carnival in my heart. Who's to know.

that stuck out to me the most, because I feel the exact same way. 

Duckie430 said...
on Dec. 29 2011 at 9:28 pm
Duckie430, Riverside, Rhode Island
0 articles 0 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
“The secret to life is being who you are and being happy with who you are.”
"Whatever does not kill you only makes you stronger."

Great poem! I've been checking out some of your other poetry & your feelings come across in your poems, which is one of the most important things in writing poetry. Great job!

on Jan. 6 2010 at 5:43 am
NamezTJ PLATINUM, Scottsville, New York
29 articles 0 photos 21 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life is like a box of chocolates...." (haha got to love Forest Gump)

Love it. Hope to see more from you :)

on Dec. 8 2009 at 6:58 pm
October_Moon GOLD, Maywood, California
15 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
Today I will be happier than a bird with a french frie.

i really like this poem and i can relate. I think its well written :)

LemonQuiche said...
on Dec. 7 2009 at 6:39 am
I dont agree with that critique at all. I think the poem was really good, and leaves the perfect amount of room to breathe, rather than crowding with descriptions.

on Dec. 3 2009 at 6:13 pm
Babygurl_101 SILVER, N/A, California
8 articles 0 photos 118 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Angels are the quiet girls that just havent been noticed yet"
"The past is the past, and i am your futuer." (<3<3<3<3<3)

this is a very good poem!!! keep writting :)

the title really drew my attn, and it really cool

on Jul. 31 2009 at 3:37 am
this is a great poem keep it up

EdytD SILVER said...
on Jun. 1 2009 at 12:31 am
EdytD SILVER, Livingston, New Jersey
6 articles 0 photos 258 comments
Very neat! I liked how you made an odd word into a poem - it's definitely a much more creative title than most of mine! :)



I think that your topic is a good one, but some of your individual lines can be strengthened. Instead of writing "miss breathtakingly gorgeous," for example, you could describe the woman's face, and explain what aspect of it makes you upset. Also, I'm not sure what you meant when you said, "is a murder in me?"



Furthermore, instead of simply blaming the woman when you wrote, "this is all your fault," you could give graphic details describing your face to show the reader that you are blaming the woman - compare your face to hers, for example, or explain how her words leave you heartbroken, and describe your face after listening toher biting words. Those are just a few style differences, though.



I particularly liked your comparison of her words to tire tracks. Great job! :D



I'd love if you took a look at my poetry. Thanks!

on May. 29 2009 at 7:41 pm
VyrenRolar PLATINUM, Meredith, New Hampshire
28 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Hope is the feathered thing that perches on the soul." Emily Dickinson

Hey. I've been published by Creative Communication, which has a website called poeticpower.com. I'll post a few more poems today.

on May. 28 2009 at 11:36 pm
ShernayB. DIAMOND, Southfield, Michigan
62 articles 1 photo 881 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Some things will never change"---Tupac

This is very good! I looked up that word...and it is considered as the longest word in the world! Way to put a poem into it!!! lol....

on May. 28 2009 at 12:33 am
VyrenRolar PLATINUM, Meredith, New Hampshire
28 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Hope is the feathered thing that perches on the soul." Emily Dickinson

This was very insightful. I liked it a lot. And I can honestly say I have been there.


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