24 Hours

September 13, 2015
By Maculate_Dream DIAMOND, Riverside, California
Maculate_Dream DIAMOND, Riverside, California
71 articles 0 photos 83 comments

Favorite Quote:
I have not failed, I just found 10,000 ways to not succeed.

All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.


24 hours, watch it flow

Pack your stuff, time to go.

It's time to leave, maybe go home

Where to go, where to roam

Only to listen to the radio

 

24 hours, hug the kids,

Try to find where they hid.

Enjoy time with brother,

Say, "I love you," to mother

No turning back what we did.

 

24 hours, watch it fly;

24 hours, look to the sky!

Watch from miles, see the glare,

Watch it bursting in the air.

Promise you won't cry.

 

24 hours, gives a chill;

Lonely valley, silent hill

Taking one final breath

Look around, nothing's left.

24 hours, standing still.


The author's comments:

After reading Ray Bradbury's There Will Come Soft Rains, there was something unique about the concept of 24 hours going throughout the day of the abandoned house the story was in. I kept repeating "24 hours" inside my mind so through some thought of what the story would be like before it was destroyed and if there was 24 hours before a nuclear bomb demolished everything, I imagined this. Enjoy!


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This article has 12 comments.


on Apr. 22 2016 at 2:21 am
StArFish1202 BRONZE, Taylor, Texas
4 articles 0 photos 16 comments

Favorite Quote:
Procrastination rules the nation!

I love this sooo much! It really shows just how much a life can change in a day.

on Feb. 11 2016 at 3:52 pm
Poetry101 BRONZE, Faith, South Dakota
3 articles 0 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
You don't need anybody to tell you who you are or what you are. You are what you are !













~John Lennon

I love it so much ;)

MBC1215 BRONZE said...
on Feb. 11 2016 at 3:31 pm
MBC1215 BRONZE, Chattanooga, Tennessee
1 article 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I see now that the circumstances of ones birth are irrelevant.It's what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are."-Mewtwo:Pokemon movie #1

That is a very nice poem.It vigorates me

on Feb. 11 2016 at 1:09 am
PresCocoRain GOLD, Montgomery, Alabama
17 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
You don't have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them.
-Rad Bradbury

Oh wow, this is really good, but it's so depressing too. Especially when I read it in the mindset of the nuclear bomb part, it reminded me of Japan in a way during WWII. I like the use of 24 hours, and I like how intense the poems gets throughout the poem. It's that mixture of naivety (because it sounds like the dad is talking to his children) and seriousness (because it's a bomb) that makes it really poignant. Really good.

on Dec. 17 2015 at 11:45 am
Trench_Coat BRONZE, PERU, Indiana
2 articles 1 photo 36 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Promise me you'll survive.
That you won't give up,
no matter what happens,
no matter how hopeless"- Titanic

When I imagine what it would be like I start to cry. You did perfect and amazing

Saturn. BRONZE said...
on Dec. 15 2015 at 10:25 pm
Saturn. BRONZE, Las Vegas, Nevada
3 articles 0 photos 55 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The mind is better than the sword"
-Unknown (I'm too lazy to look it up)
"All warfare is based on deception"
-Sun Tzu

I imagined this in a song, and its a very beautiful song. (I think I'm tearing up from this)

on Dec. 9 2015 at 12:38 am
winny_addams PLATINUM, Apple Valley, Minnesota
47 articles 0 photos 50 comments

Favorite Quote:
Beauty is found within, don't judge from beauty outside judge the beauty inside

OMG I flipping love it! I actually pictured every single thing you said in my head. You are one amazing writer! Keep on writing and never stop no matter what comes your way. You have one amazing gift. I look forward to reading more of your stuff xD

ItsOk BRONZE said...
on Nov. 28 2015 at 1:23 am
ItsOk BRONZE, Lansing, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 2 comments
This is absolutely beautiful. It had an enchanting cadence and your rhyming seems effortless. I love the focus on the concept of time... it's such a mysterious, fleeting, sometimes horribly sad thing.

on Oct. 28 2015 at 5:37 pm
ThisEmilyDa1 SILVER, BF, New Mexico
6 articles 0 photos 101 comments

Favorite Quote:
only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile
-Albert Instien
the only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday.

Yay! I like good poetry. I like the rhyming, I like rhyming poems. And it's an interesting concept too, good job. I like how it seems like a list, your WAY better that me. Ps. My big bro is about to get his Eagle Scout too! Good luck with your project. :)

on Sep. 30 2015 at 9:22 pm
Blackjack. GOLD, Suffolk, Virginia
13 articles 0 photos 94 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Take a lesson from "the Greatest Man That Ever Lived," Austin Aries. The ambition and vision of one depends on how bad@ss they look in sunglasses." - Me, 2017

"Who is this Jose, and why is he always being denied?" - Corey Graves, 2016

Interesting concept. 10/10

addy.74 SILVER said...
on Sep. 16 2015 at 8:55 pm
addy.74 SILVER, Austin, Texas
9 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"In the end, we remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends." -MLK

wow this is great!

on Sep. 15 2015 at 11:00 pm
Maculate_Dream DIAMOND, Riverside, California
71 articles 0 photos 83 comments

Favorite Quote:
I have not failed, I just found 10,000 ways to not succeed.

All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream.

I would like to say thanks to anyone for reading my poem, means a lot to me!!!




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