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I Love You, My Dear

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I feel the wind blow on my face
As I think of you, my dear
Blistering summer nights
and chilly winter morns
You told me to never fear

I miss you so much my dear, my dear
I think of you all the time
Just one more hour with you,
my dear,
Now that would be sublime

You hand me a flower for my hair,
Though you I cannot see
It's you I feel, my life, my love,
Come to set me free

I miss you so much my dear, my dear
I think of you all the time
Just one more hour with you,
my dear,
Now that would be sublime

I feel the wind, more insistent
this time,
It begs me to just give in
I embrace the pain, the love,
the strife
And let myself be swept away by
you, the wind

I love you so much my dear, my dear
I am forever by your side
As we live, we love, and die,
my dear
And learn to love what's inside




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This article has 5 comments. Post your own!

ambnycThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 27, 2012 at 11:14 pm:

The rhyme scheme is very good! I think if you insert that wind image at the end, you should put it in the beginning instead and just work with it through the whole poem.

Also, some great writing advice I've gotten was that don't be expositional -- instead of saying something ("I miss you," "I love you"), show it. So describe something else -- maybe talk about the person that's being missed in this poem? -- to show how much you miss and love them.

 
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HazyeyesThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Feb. 17, 2012 at 4:52 pm:
(i apologize in advance for spelling) I LOV IT!! Great rhyme scheme ps.(read, rate and comment on my work) PLEASE, IT WOULD BE AN HONOR TO HAVE U READ MY POEM!!
 
irishlass317 replied...
Feb. 24, 2012 at 10:18 pm :
thank you so very much!! I really appreciate your comment!!! I will definitely look at your work!! :D <3
 
thatclarinetgirl12 replied...
Feb. 26, 2012 at 11:54 am :

THis is amazing!

 

 
irishlass317 replied...
Feb. 29, 2012 at 6:26 pm :
Thank you1! I worked really hard on it!! <3
 
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