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I Had A Dream

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I dreamed I went to a strange place,
An oppressed, dreary land,
Where government bows its head
To violent outlaw bands.

Instead it preys on weak and good
With taxes they don't need,
And to true crime their eyes they hood,
And ignore who did the deed.

Most leaders let drug lords roam free,
Abuse drugs, and power too,
Or don't know who these culprits are
And hide them when they do.

Some try to get away, to flee
This place where crime is rule.
Or give in, rebelling at nothing,
Accepting fate as cruel.

O Why don't they take fate in hand?
I'd rally to their side!
Why not throw down the failures and
Lift up some worthy guides?

Why do I care what happens here?
Why not leave them alone?
Why care if dreams exist in fear?
Why not wake up, go home?

Because I see why they fell though,
Progress slowed to a crawl.
I see and fear my nation too
Has now begun it's fall.



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This article has 40 comments. Post your own!

julywinters1226 said...
Dec. 5, 2011 at 5:47 pm:
very good.I like the details and meaning put into it.:)
 
LoudDreamer replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:24 pm :
Thank you, julywinters, I feel imagry is my strongest point when it comes to writing, so Im glad you like that about it.
 
♪MyBestest♪ replied...
Dec. 8, 2011 at 6:44 am :
Not bad. Keep writting.
 
LoudDreamer replied...
Dec. 8, 2011 at 6:46 am :
Thank you, I will!
 
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Simplemelody said...
Nov. 29, 2011 at 5:18 pm:
Wow this is really good. I love the descriptiveness and how it rings so true. Great job!
 
LoudDreamer replied...
Dec. 4, 2011 at 3:44 pm :
Thank you melody! That means alot.
 
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xxtennis13xx said...
Nov. 29, 2011 at 4:34 pm:
I really really like this poem, but if you don't mind me saying, I don't think the title is very appropriate. Well, it is, and maybe it's just me, but I think anything titled "I had/have a dream" should stay credited to Martin Luther King Jr.  Just my opinion!
 
LoudDreamer replied...
Nov. 29, 2011 at 5:19 pm :

Lol, he isn't the only one in the world who used that phrase! But yeah, I get it, I'd have probbably changed it if I hadn't been so impatiant to have it published. Besides, I think that if I named it "Lincolns Inagural Address" it would have made more sense!

oh, I just messing with you. It IS a pretty uncreative title, expecially sense it is almost like a depressing nightmare instead of a dream. I'm very glad that you like it and came to comment on it. Thank you.

 
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tr3bl3grrl said...
Nov. 28, 2011 at 4:21 pm:
Really good! I really liked the poem you posted on my forum, also. You'll probably win cuz no one else has replied yet. :) You're really good at wrtiting in verse. I can't rhyme well, so I usually stick to free-verse. I noticed on your profile you really like J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis, and I was wondering if you thought they failed on most parts of the Dawntreader, like I thought? You just seem like a really good poet and a nice person all around. :) Thx for replying to my forum.
 
LoudDreamer replied...
Nov. 28, 2011 at 5:04 pm :

Really? Wow, thanks! It's always cool to hear that someone likes what you wrote.

Nah, Dawn Treader was good! But honestly my favorite of Lewis's is still The Horse And His Boy. I knew Tolkien was Lewis's mentor and friend, but do you think he actually had anything to do with his books? I never occuered to me that he might have helped....

 
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theUnknownandtheAnonymous This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Nov. 27, 2011 at 5:31 pm:
Finally got around to reading some of your work, and let me say that this poem is great! Be sure to post more; can't wait to see where life takes you with your writing.
 
LoudDreamer replied...
Nov. 28, 2011 at 8:55 am :
Sweet! That means alot coming from you.
 
SkyyeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:11 pm :

wow, very good Loud!!

I like the message in it and I think you did really well with it.

 
LoudDreamer replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:22 pm :
Thanks, Skyye! It wasn't an easy thing for someone like me to write about, most things like this would turn into a crazy rant with me.
 
SkyyeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:24 pm :
yeah, I can understand that, I find it hard to write things about it as well....
 
LoudDreamer replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:26 pm :
Lol, I wonder why? Are polotics just naturally provacative? Or are we just really bad at it?
 
SkyyeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:28 pm :
hehe, I think politics naturally bring out the need to argue, the need to voice your opinion, and I have a very strong opinion, so I tend to steer clear of the subject, lol
 
LoudDreamer replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:29 pm :
aw, I wanna hear it! Why not write one political poem? just for me.... please?
 
SkyyeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:31 pm :

well, I'm in the middle of writing one about war, and I'm putting a lot of my emotions in it,

so I'll write one political poem soon, for you, but it may be awhile :)

 
LoudDreamer replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:32 pm :
okay, just find me in the fourms when it gose up on the site. I gotta go. Seeya!
 
SkyyeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:52 pm :

well, it turns out this poem is political, in a way, so I guess you get one now, lol.

ok seeya, it's up now when you have the time to check it out :)

 
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