The brother I lost

April 5, 2018
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You never know how much you love something until you lose it
Year after year, to be honest I completely blew it
I had someone to call a brother
Someone to treat like a mother

Even still I was always focused on something other
I’m sorry I never told you that I loved you
I’m sorry I always put people above you
You are my family even if you never have time to get around to me

The silence between us is drowning me
I love what you found in me
You will always be family
Even if you never learned to understand me

I'm so sorry our families had to split
And we were left in the midst
At least we learned to build some grit
I just wish this could all be fixed

I know I can't understand what you were going through
I wish you weren't bullied in school
You gave up, stopped following the rules
Started hanging out with the fools

Drugs took over your life
Made you want to fight
So one day you took to school a knife
That's what started what I call the dark nights

Things got worse
You kicked some boys face into a curb
They all thought you would never learn
But all along I knew you were just hurt

I was never scared of you
But at the same time I was never there for you
The world was so unfair to you
You got checked into the system but they never cared for you

I just wish you knew
That the memories I shared with you
Completely changed my view
I felt like I really knew the true you

You would sing and play guitar
You have so much potential to make it far
You don't always have to put up a guard
Just show them you really are

There's grief inside your lyrics
Relief inside your lyrics
You sound more free inside your lyrics
Others can see inside your lyrics

I'll never let you slip through the seems
Not when you have such big dreams
I know you’re not what you seem
Take a second to breathe

I hope you rise above
I love you my brother
But sometimes I wonder
If you will ever recover

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