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The Vanilla Ice of Home Appliances This work is considered exceptional by our editorial staff.

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We were on the fringe of societal destruction
A twinge in the lobe parietal, an amalgam of misconstruction
A sharp syringe, maniacal obstruction.
But then comes Charles Hager, the genius behind the door hinge.

Founder of Hager & Co, he’s often credited
For fixing the flounder of misery and woe, and enkindling adrenaline
In hardware stores of the 1850’s, he edited
His present and the future and enkindled hope in all men again.

The hinge is implanted and taken for granted in our society
Hager is writhing in his grave with great anxiety
So please, refrain from ignorant in-piety
Give the man himself his noteworthy notoriety.

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