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What's wrong?

I'm tired.
Of this.
Of you ignoring
My worsening state.
My eyes
Have become like sunken shadows
Mindless and dull
From losing sleep
So often.
I've grown pale
From lack of light
From getting sick
Every day before school.
Have you noticed?
You don't care.
I'm too skinny
From skipping meals

Have you eaten?
Yes, of course.

I trip and jitter.
I nearly faint sometimes
From forgetting to drink
Water.
When I have to see people
I panic
I vomit.
And I grow sweaty and weak.

You ask if I'm sick.
Yes, you could say that.

My voice is quiet
And hoarse.
When I see knives
All I can think of
Is what kind of cut they would make
On my skin.
Rusted teeth
Might make ridges
Or give me some disease.
I want to stay in bed.
My chest is falling apart.

You say to get up.
I don't want to get up.

Smiles are forced and plastic.
I say I have to go.
Convulsive sobs.
What is wrong with me?
I can't leave the house.
I have to leave the house.
I'm afraid
Of the people
Who watch from the street.
Do they want to hurt me?
I want to hurt me.

You say
Get over it
You have a good life.

`I believe you.
So why
Am I dying
Like this?

What's wrong?
Nothing.




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