I Will Not Write You a Birthday Poem | Teen Ink

I Will Not Write You a Birthday Poem

January 13, 2016
By annastrosser SILVER, Danbury, Connecticut
annastrosser SILVER, Danbury, Connecticut
5 articles 0 photos 0 comments


two months ago,
you told me to write you a birthday poem
something personal you said
something that you could keep in your wallet
tucked in between the ticket from the first concert you ever went to
and the picture of your grandma that passed
the one you wanna get that tattoo for
the tattoo of the date that you last saw her

“6/14/07”
the day your heart stopped
the day your lungs stopped
the day you had the first line
and the day you I stopped waiting in one
the line of people who stood there trying to protect you
when all you wanted was to destroy yourself

I will not write you a birthday poem
of beautiful words or metaphors
of anaphora or sibilance
when you’re too high
to notice what they mean

I will not write you a birthday poem
when your body is too weak to blow out the candles
face white as the icing
they say you are what you eat
or snort
or the way that you see best to kill yourself

I will not write you a birthday poem
but I wish you the happiest one of all
but that won’t be because of me
because I will not congratulate you
on a year that you don’t remember
one that you survived on accident

I will not write you a birthday poem
yet I’ll try and give you the world on your birthday
I’ll get you a new aux cord for your car
so you can drown out the noise easier
the noise that started ringing in your ear
but I will not sit here
stringing words together
for you to use this paper
as a flat surface
to snort some before go out
that’ll lose its ink in the powder of your lover

I will not write you a birthday poem
when I’ve already started your obituary

I saw your mother the other day
she asked what I was getting you for your birthday
I told her nothing 



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