Pretty good

This was perfectly penned! Love the imagery!

wow i realy liked this. ur use of words actually had me picturing what was hapening

Haha. Sorry for leaving a "novel" on this. I leave lengthy comments to fulkky analyze both the piece and my thoughts reflecting it. Again great read, and excuse the atrocities caused by my misspellings. ب_ب

Your title, is drawing. And not because of my username haha, but because it seemed a shame to ignore something that is promising. Thought provoking, extremely thought provoking. "The demon's still outside my window, Knocking not very loud. He smiles at me with q vicious grin, And doesn't make a sound" when I read this line, I thought of it in a figurative way. For exampke, the window, would be representing a person's mindset. The demon, everyone faces is themselves, and  ones innerself persuades to corruption, and later mentioned in the poem desolation. Something that feels so right, can be gained from doing something completely wrong. The rhythm of the poem is nicely done, and the pioem its self is impeccable. Powerful throughout, aidded by your creative is what adds the eccentric uniqueness to this poem, making it all the more well done. The authors not, is short and simoke, yet simplicity, is complexity at its finest. Thus is what actuallt made me start thinkinh throughout the poem, because everyone sees demons. Everyone fight demons, some win, but somre also lose, and you convey an idea of this in the first four lines, "There's a demon outside my window, I want to let him in, I know that if I do I lose, But I forgot why I want to win" brilliantly worded, as this signifies the narrators wilk to resist such salacity of corruption (any sort) has begun to eescend into a dream, and in there end the narrator gives in, as foretold. As the poem goes on, the demon is being invited. All will to resist fades as aforementioned. and the narrator looks into the demons eyes, finding him or herself. "...He shows me eyes that look like mine, Full of desolation and despair" my favorite line throughout the whole piece. Short, and yet overpowering, opening the readers mine to possibilities. Well done, this is by far the most thought provoking pooem Ive read so far. Extremely well penned. As for suggestions, i don't see anything other than punctiant, a few places the punctuation felt odd or it needed to be rearranged. Nevertheless, i enjoyed this, and i hope you write a piece that surpasses this both in quality, and creativity as you have demonstrated great talent and even greater potential. 

thank you i really appreciated hearing your feedback

This poem can be quite confusing.  You go from "a demon" to "the demon" to "my demon" making the reader think you mean more than one.... Its quite amazing to read a poem-story such as this because the reader would need to analyze every inch of the wording, but not only that; the reader would need to analyze his/herself.  It seems as if in this world we all have demons.  We look in the mirror and see one, outside our window, inside our bedrooms.. There is always a demon.  This poem is brightly colored to show us that these things do exist.  Also, the rhythm was well, there weren't any grammatical errors, so that's always a plus.  But I myself, as a reader, I see the demons as inner and outer battles which make life a swirling vortex of confusion.  And this poem showed the depths of what is real in everyday reality...... I hope to see more of your writing soon!! Thank you!

Wow, I loved this! It was really great. Your words flow freely and nicely. I'll check out more of your work. Keep it up! You have a real talent! ^_^

Woah great use of metaphors, and this is very creative. The poem has a very deep meaning I can definitely relate to. Nice work