Chaos Theory | Teen Ink

Chaos Theory MAG

November 14, 2008
By Anonymous

Carolyn says she believes in angels
while mascara spiders creep thickly along the
heavy baggage beneath her eyes like the
black pitch of the school hallways at night or
the charcoal that she dips her fingernails in and I
remember cheating on my math test that morning
So
I tell her I believe in people.

Roasted honey nut, the color she was born with but
you really wouldn’t know it because of the midnight L’Oréal
she chooses, tragically highlighted with Punk Pink or
Raging Red from a bottle and 15
minutes of waiting –
It spills limply over her black eyes whenever she leans down to write and
Carolyn says she believes in fate.

In planets aligning in the universe and
Feng shui that keeps mice away and prevents ulcers but also
makes a girl fall in love with a boy but
I know all about chemistry and hormones and catalysts so I
think I believe in science.

In reincarnation, she thinks she’ll come back as a bird
Or maybe a peacock and I say I agree when I
see those striped stockings that come to her knees and
neon earrings lifeless at her shoulders but she only laughs …
tells me I never really see her and to
call her later.

Now with the dial tone in my ear
the cold trembling and I’m suffocating on nothing
because I really see her and I
know she believes in the afterlife but
she doesn’t believe in laughter and
the phone just rings and rings and rings …

Carolyn said she believed in angels.



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This article has 376 comments.


on Apr. 12 2010 at 3:34 pm
shelterisland GOLD, Montclair, New Jersey
14 articles 0 photos 175 comments

Favorite Quote:
-Biting's excellent. It's like kissing only there's a winner."-Doctor Who, The Tardis

WOW, THIS IS AMAZING, I LOVE IT!!!!

Eilatan GOLD said...
on Apr. 12 2010 at 12:18 pm
Eilatan GOLD, Old Greenwich, Connecticut
11 articles 1 photo 307 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Nobody is normal. Everybody in the world is a weirdo freak. Except you, which makes you a weirdo freak."

THIS IS AMAZING

on Apr. 10 2010 at 6:51 pm
MeghanMichelle GOLD, Hooksett, New Hampshire
12 articles 0 photos 77 comments
Beautiful poem.

on Apr. 7 2010 at 11:47 pm
Mr_Anonymous SILVER, Ripon, California
5 articles 2 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"...There's no defense
except all the errors
made..."

-Excerpt from "Claws of Paradise" - C. Bukowski

I love this poem.  It has great flow and great meaning.  The way the poem is structured and where you decided to end each line reminds me (in the best possible way) of Bukowski's poetry.

on Mar. 21 2010 at 10:03 pm
Nez.sner.snafala.boo, Hayward, California
0 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
"the real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space."
-marilyn monroe

did Carolyn kill herself?cause in the begining it says "Carolyn says she believes in angels"

and then at the end it says "Carolyn said she believed in angels"

on Mar. 21 2010 at 9:54 pm
Quesadilliaaa, Dowiningtown, Pennsylvania
0 articles 6 photos 16 comments
Brought me to tears, the ending. This is amazing.

on Mar. 21 2010 at 9:41 pm
Hollywog. PLATINUM, Mole Creek, Other
21 articles 23 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all..

An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind - Ghandi

W.O.W.

This poem is absolutely amazing.

It is so powerful and the way you've described everything is phenomenal. This has got to be one of my favourite poems ever, as of today!!

You have an amazing talent - never ever let it go! :)

All the best..

Love and Sunshine,

Holly!

xoxo

on Mar. 21 2010 at 8:21 pm
Dandelion PLATINUM, Franklin, Massachusetts
20 articles 8 photos 173 comments
Whoa! Just whoa.

TheJust ELITE said...
on Mar. 17 2010 at 11:36 am
TheJust ELITE, Ellenton, Florida
254 articles 202 photos 945 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I feel that a hero is somebody who will stand up for their values and what they believe in and that can take any form. People that have values and have thought them through rather than those who just do what they’re told."-Skandar Keynes

"When it’

This is my all-time fave poem! It's amazing!!!!!!!

on Mar. 16 2010 at 4:10 pm
VioletsandVoice, Spiritwood, North Dakota
0 articles 0 photos 170 comments
i have read this like four different times and i still love it! great job

on Mar. 10 2010 at 11:51 am
StevieRene SILVER, Magnolia, Texas
6 articles 0 photos 25 comments

Favorite Quote:
Everyone will hurt you, you have to decide who is worth it
- Bob Marley

This reminds me of my ex girl friend, Your writing is wonderful , please keep up your great writing.

on Feb. 27 2010 at 8:23 pm
okeydokey SILVER, Cle Elum, Washington
9 articles 0 photos 13 comments
you write with such deep understanding, knowledge, and mystery that i have the sense i am reading the thoughts of someone.

i can't describe it completely, but your writing seems........ more life-like than life.

it's beautiful. don't ever stop writing like this.

on Feb. 27 2010 at 3:16 pm
LoveLikeWoe DIAMOND, LeSueur, MN, Minnesota
54 articles 2 photos 748 comments

Favorite Quote:
Whoever laughs first has the sickest mind.

this is wonderful, beautiful. it deserves six thousand stars if only they had it. :)

on Feb. 27 2010 at 11:17 am
thezebrasgray PLATINUM, Taylorsville, Utah
46 articles 0 photos 231 comments
Amazing! I love it, and you did a good job of describing half the kids at my Junior High

Dghim said...
on Feb. 16 2010 at 12:25 pm
Hello! Yes, of course. That would be perfectly fine, and I'm quite flattered actually. I was sixteen when I wrote thise poem, and I am eighteen now. On that note, thank you everyone for your good and bad feedback! I appreciate your criticisms so much and I hope that I've grown to be a better writer since this piece!

tjcreative said...
on Feb. 16 2010 at 8:16 am
I think you did an excellent job of creating beautiful imagery in this poem. I teach a poetry class to teenagers and I'd love to use this poem in the class? Would that be okay with you? Also, I'd like to include your age but I don't see it posted on the site. It's inspiring to the students to read work from their peers. How old were you when you wrote this?

on Feb. 7 2010 at 8:00 pm
greeneyes BRONZE, Vancouver, Other
1 article 0 photos 1 comment
This is beautiful

on Feb. 5 2010 at 8:59 pm
VioletsandVoice, Spiritwood, North Dakota
0 articles 0 photos 170 comments
wow...that's all i feel is needed to express this piece but since I need at least 10 characters in the box im making it a little longer :)

on Feb. 5 2010 at 7:03 pm
xlacrossex22 GOLD, Glenshaw, Pennsylvania
12 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
“I laugh, I love, I hope, I try, I hurt, I need, I fear, I cry. And I know you do the same things too, So we're really not that different, me and you.” ~Colin Raye~

Amazing, AMAZING!!! You are such an inspiring author! I love how the piece feels like memory.

izz123 GOLD said...
on Feb. 5 2010 at 6:16 pm
izz123 GOLD, Gaithersburg, Maryland
13 articles 5 photos 24 comments
This is definitively going in my favorites. The imagery is beautiful. Great job.