A Ball Room | Teen Ink

A Ball Room

March 10, 2012
By DaisyAngel BRONZE, Sandy Springs, Georgia
DaisyAngel BRONZE, Sandy Springs, Georgia
3 articles 0 photos 65 comments

A chandelier hangs above the dancers.
Light is reflected against the stone floors.

The crowd twirls, figures moving in a blur.
In the corner, near the drinks, a man stands.

He gazes across the room, his eyes bright.
He cannot help but smile when he sees her.

She is the woman in red with dark lochs.
Diamonds cling to her throat as she moves.

She smirks before grabbing her husband’s arm.
Man and Wife swim in a sea of color.

The author's comments:
I wrote this piece when I was told by my writing class instructor to write a 10X10 poem.

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This article has 23 comments.


on May. 27 2012 at 10:44 am
these-roses GOLD, Bristol, Indiana
14 articles 2 photos 37 comments

Favorite Quote:
so many books, so little time

it told a story. i really liked that

deleted said...
on May. 22 2012 at 9:10 am
deleted, Miami, Florida
0 articles 0 photos 194 comments
Really cool idea and great imagery, keep up the good work, you have some awesome word choice in there :)

butterfly123 said...
on May. 22 2012 at 5:14 am
butterfly123, Banglore, Other
0 articles 0 photos 408 comments
very coy and smart. when i read the line in which the man first sees her, i thought there was going to be a cinderella-dancing-into-happily-ever-after ending but the twist really had me. great work and keep writing :D

on Mar. 23 2012 at 3:01 pm
thetruthawaits94 SILVER, Duncan, Oklahoma
9 articles 0 photos 351 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, but learning to dance in the rain.

Thanks! it's at the top of the forums called Let Go!

on Mar. 23 2012 at 6:27 am
DaisyAngel BRONZE, Sandy Springs, Georgia
3 articles 0 photos 65 comments
I'd love to! I'll just have to find them in the Forum first. :)

on Mar. 22 2012 at 6:32 pm
thetruthawaits94 SILVER, Duncan, Oklahoma
9 articles 0 photos 351 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, but learning to dance in the rain.

Yeah I wish that they did it the same way that you can change things in the forums though! I mean something!!! haha. You should send in more poems soon! Will you mind reading my two poems in the forums? I need some people to check those over before i send them in, and like no one is helping me out! lol. I want someone to give me a different point of view on them before i do anything!

on Mar. 22 2012 at 6:13 pm
DaisyAngel BRONZE, Sandy Springs, Georgia
3 articles 0 photos 65 comments
Sure, I'd love to look at some of your work, especially since you took the time to look at mine!

on Mar. 22 2012 at 6:10 pm
DaisyAngel BRONZE, Sandy Springs, Georgia
3 articles 0 photos 65 comments
I know, right? I guess they don't let you change things because the submission process takes so long.

on Mar. 22 2012 at 6:04 pm
DaisyAngel BRONZE, Sandy Springs, Georgia
3 articles 0 photos 65 comments
Thanks so much!

on Mar. 22 2012 at 6:00 pm
dbacksgirl29 BRONZE, Peoria, Arizona
2 articles 0 photos 17 comments
It really meant a lot to me when you commented on my poem so im doing the same for you. I really loved the image it painted in my mind. Keep writing! :)

on Mar. 22 2012 at 5:59 pm
thetruthawaits94 SILVER, Duncan, Oklahoma
9 articles 0 photos 351 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, but learning to dance in the rain.

Oh, I see! And I completely understand. I wish that was different. It's a bit annoying really!

on Mar. 22 2012 at 5:57 pm
DaisyAngel BRONZE, Sandy Springs, Georgia
3 articles 0 photos 65 comments
You're right about everything. I was typing it up after I wrote it by hand and didn't look back over it before I sunmitted it. Also, the title should be "A Ballroom" and not "A Ball Room". I realized my error too late, as in the second I hit the
"Submit" button. I wish that there was a way to go back, but there isn't. :P 

on Mar. 22 2012 at 5:48 pm
DaisyAngel BRONZE, Sandy Springs, Georgia
3 articles 0 photos 65 comments
You're right. :)

illusions GOLD said...
on Mar. 22 2012 at 2:37 pm
illusions GOLD, I Dontg Even Like This Town, Other
10 articles 0 photos 150 comments

This is great! I luv weddings!

Can u check out my work and comment plz?


on Mar. 22 2012 at 2:20 pm
thetruthawaits94 SILVER, Duncan, Oklahoma
9 articles 0 photos 351 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, but learning to dance in the rain.

as for interpretation, I think it is a man and a woman seeing eachother across the room to dance, and it turns out that the two are a married couple. Which is nice. :))) I don't know if I'm right though!!!

on Mar. 22 2012 at 2:15 pm
thetruthawaits94 SILVER, Duncan, Oklahoma
9 articles 0 photos 351 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, but learning to dance in the rain.

I really like this! That's awesome that it's a 10x10 poem. really cool! on the second to last stanza should it be locks? not lochs? Great job! 

miaq96 SILVER said...
on Mar. 22 2012 at 12:15 pm
miaq96 SILVER, Karachi, Other
7 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
never run after success,be such a person that success runs after you.

amazing....i could not help smiling when I reached the end:)

on Mar. 22 2012 at 6:21 am
DaisyAngel BRONZE, Sandy Springs, Georgia
3 articles 0 photos 65 comments
Thanks for commenting! I'm glad that you told me specifically what you liked about it. I will be sure to use this technique more often when writing. :)

on Mar. 22 2012 at 6:19 am
DaisyAngel BRONZE, Sandy Springs, Georgia
3 articles 0 photos 65 comments
Thanks so much! I appreciate you taking the time to comment.

on Mar. 21 2012 at 10:37 pm
Zero_Black BRONZE, Las Vegas, Nevada
1 article 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
If you love something, then let it go,
If it comes back, it's yours forever,
If it leaves you, then it was never meant to be.

very pretty! the imagery is well done and i love how you leave the "surprise" at the end. good job, for class work.